“… bent her over just like that…”

“… made her squeal like a pig…”

I rolled my eyes as dad and Roger bragged about their conquests.

When they saw it, they both laughed.

“It’s gonna be fine, baby brother,” Roger said, turning to me.

A moment later, I felt dad’s heavy hand on my shoulder.

“You ready for the big day, Mark?”

I sighed.

“Isn’t your first time supposed to be special? Why not Laura from down the street? It’s about love, isn’t it?”

They both burst out laughing again.

“There’s a time and place for love, son, but your first time’s gonna be messy and chaotic. Best to get it over with and-“

“Why do I have to do it in front of you and Roger?”

“Family tradition, son. I was there when Roger had his first and grandpa was with me when I had mine.”

“Yeah, but it’s stupid!”

Dad shrugged and handed me a beer.

As I took it, Roger left the room.

“Roger found just the one for you.”

With that, Roger led a chubby prostitute into the room. The air filled with the smell of cheap perfume and menthol cigarettes.

Her face was caked with make-up and she’d pushed herself into a dress at least two sizes too small for her.

“That the birthday boy?” she asked, giving a smile that was meant to be seductive. It almost made me gag.

“Yeah, Candy, that’s him. Mark turned eighteen just today,” Roger answered.

The woman stepped forward, closing the space between me and her in mere moments.

“Well, I’ll make sure it’s going to be a very special day,” she said, giving me a wink.

Roger had gotten himself a beer and sat down next to dad. I stood there, helplessly, staring from dad to Roger and then back to Candy.

She’d already started to undress. She tried to be seductive, but all I could do was stare at her white, puffy flesh and those huge sagging tits.

For a moment I watched the grotesque spectacle, watched as she laid down and spread her legs wide for me.

With sweaty hands, I took off my shirt and unbuttoned my pants.

I moved forward, crawling closer to the mattress she laid on.

Then I pushed myself on top of her. Our eyes met and at that moment a rush came over me.

This was it, my first time.

My hand closed around my instrument of choice. The one I’d concealed for so long.

I thrust it into her with all the force I could muster and it vanished between her legs.

Candy screamed as the cold, hard metal of the knife entered her.

And I, still on top of her, smiled.

Oh, it was messy, and it was chaotic. It was my first time. But dad and Roger were there to help me take care of things.

After all, it’s family tradition that they help you with your very first kill.

The miscarriage had devastated Emma. What had once been a happy woman, full of love, had become a curled up ball of misery and pain.

It was the same for me, back then. I, too, felt the same sense of loss, the same pain, but I knew I had to be strong, for both of us. That terrible wound that threatened to tear our relationship apart had to be mended.

It had taken a lot of time, a lot of work, but as I stared at her peacefully sleeping face now, I knew that time could heal all wounds.

Once more I gently put my hand on her stomach. So much time, so much love, but finally we were ready again.

For a moment I put my head against her stomach, listened, but I knew the baby was as asleep as she was.

I went to get myself a drink of water, but when I returned I found Emma’s face distorted. She shifted in the bed and a moment later her eyes fluttered open.

I was with her in an instant.

“John, what’s…?” she starts, but I put a finger against her lips.

With a gentle smile, I pushed her back down onto the bed.

“You should rest dear, everything will be all right,” I whispered into her ear and kissed her cheek.

She leaned back, relaxing before she drifted off again.

As I looked at her, I felt tears coming to my eyes. She looked so comfortable, so happy. Seeing her like this filled me with such bliss.

Oh, I knew, after all this, we’d finally be a happy little family.

I took another sip of water before I leaned back in the chair next to her. Love can exhaust too.

The room was quiet, the only sound that of her quiet breathing, and eventually I drifted off to sleep as well.

I jerked up when a scream cut through the room.

My eyes found Emma, my beautiful wife, but her face was distorted by terror, her mouth torn open by a perpetual scream.

“Babe, no, calm down, it’s all right, it’s all right,” I whispered as I pulled her into my arms.

Her eyes found me and she stared at me with quivering lips while her hand still clutched onto the blanket she’d pulled aside.

“John, what’s going on!? What’s… this?” she asked and pointed at the long line of stitches on her bloated stomach.

I smiled at her.

“It’s all right, Emma, it’s all right,” I whispered at her again, as I cradled her in my arms.

“He will be all right, too. Our baby boy will be all right. I just had to put him back so he could heal. Everything will be all right, and we’ll finally be a happy little family.”

Oh, my dear Lizzy, my beautiful wife, I can’t find the words to tell you how much I love you. I guess that’s how it is with true love.

I still remember the day we met like it was yesterday. The sun was high, not a cloud in the sky, and the very first early bloomers were blossoming.

Just another beautiful day at the park.

It all changed the moment I saw you and your long blond hair shimmering in the sunlight. When you gave me that shy brief smile, my heart melted away.

When I approached you, you were taken aback. Who could blame you, really? Still, you laughed at the silly pickup line I shot you and after only a few words you agreed to go out with me.

I guess, it was love at first sight. Almost as if the two of us were destined to be together.

When you followed me home, I knew this was the luckiest day of my life. I couldn’t believe a girl like you could ever be mine, and I have to admit I was a bit worried. Yet, you didn’t say a thing about the mess; not a word about the chaos. No, you accepted me the way I was and for that, I loved you even more.

Oh, how I enjoyed those first days with you. Those days when we were blinded with passion and the world didn’t matter.

Of course, I knew those couldn’t last forever. Eventually routine settled in. Words became scarce, but our love, our bond grew stronger and more intense.

There was no need to say anything anymore, and I loved those quiet evenings. The ones when we sat together, me holding you in my arms.

I didn’t mind that you didn’t laugh at my jokes and didn’t react to the movies I played for us. That was just the way you were.

The very best, though, were those nights when our love grew blazing hot and we enjoyed and shared each other’s bodies for hours on end. I still remember how the hot, sweet smell of our lovemaking wafted through the small, crowded apartment.

Oh, dear Lizzy, how much I love you.

Even now, in these latter days of our relationship, I still love you as much as the day you first appeared in my life. No, I guess I love you even more now.

I don’t mind that you’ve become big and soft. I promise, I don’t. Change is natural, and change doesn’t have to be a bad thing. No, even now I love you and at times I almost can’t tear myself off your body.

You know, Lizzy, love isn’t just a visual thing. It’s so much more. It’s a combination of all the senses; not just sight, it’s touch, taste, smell, and hearing.

Oh, my dear Lizzy, how I wish we could stay together forever.

When I kissed you today though, I knew things were coming to an end. I enjoyed that kiss. I enjoyed it more than any other we shared before.

That’s why it pains you so much that it had to be our very last one.

Even now, as I’m typing this, as the tears stream hot from my eyes, I can still taste you. I can still feel your heavy, thick lips on mine. Yet, the moment I kissed you, I knew that nothing lasts forever.

When I felt your lips glued to mine, I thought it was nothing but passion. But when I couldn’t get away without tearing them off, I knew.

I knew you were past your prime; I knew the decay had proceeded far too much.

It pains me so much, my dear, sweet Lizzy, but I’ve got to get rid of you tonight.

And then tomorrow, it’s time to find myself a new wife.