Condom Run – How Getting Rubbers Saved My Life

Bringing a hot girl to my dorm room was not something I ever expected would happen to me. I’m not the popular type, never was. Hell, I’m a freaking nerd!

Making out, however, felt great. Her lips were so soft, her kiss sensual, but domineering. She pushed me onto the bad hard, and I felt her heavy breasts on my chest.

For a moment, I tried to move so she wouldn’t feel how excited I was, but she merely giggled and pushed me down harder.

We continued, our tongues entangled before she moved back to take off her shirt and bra. Seconds later she was entirely naked.

When I sat there, ogling her body, she giggled again.

“Get naked,” she whispered into my bear, slightly biting my earlobe.

“Y-yeah,” I answered in an excited, almost shrill voice.

I tried to pull off my shirt so quickly, I almost entangled my arms. Then I tore down my pants.

“Come here,” she whispered, bidding me forward to join her in bed.

All right, condoms, where are my condoms?

“H-hold on,” I brought out, turned around and rummaged through my cupboard. I pushed around all the useless clutter that had accumulated over the course of multiple semesters, but the tiny pack of rubbers was nowhere to be found.

Shit, shit, shit, where the hell are they?

“Dammit,” I cursed up.

“What’s going on, lover boy?” she asked laughing.

“Condoms,” I brought out. “I knew I had some, but,” my voice trailed off before I got an idea. I didn’t like it very much, but…

In mere seconds, I’d put my clothes back on and rushed for the door.

“All right, hold on a second,” I blurted out, holding up my arms, bidding her to stay in bed.

“I’ll be right back!”

“Don’t take too long, lover boy,” she joked, while playing with a lock of her hair, giving me a seductive smile.

Shit, for a moment I wanted nothing more than to go for it, but then I left the room and raced through our small three-room apartment.

I could hear my roommates, Rick and Barry, already. The two of them were still sitting in the kitchen, each holding a beer in their hands.

They stared at me, puzzled, before their faces turned to glee.

“What’s the matter, Jake, did she run away?” Barry asked.

“Couldn’t get it up?” Rick joined in.

“What? No, it’s not that, she’s waiting. Do you guys, eh, have any condoms? I can’t find mine so,” my voice trailed off.

I stared at them expectantly, but for a few moments there was nothing but awkward silence. Then they both burst out laughing.

“Holy shit, dude, what?” Barry pressed out, sprouting beer from his mouth.

“Sorry, bro, I’m all out. Used them all up the other week,” Rick added, laughing himself.

“Fuck, come on, guys, she’s already naked and-“

“Should’ve thought about that before you took her home.”

“Shit! You know what? Fuck you guys!”

With their laughter trailing after me, I hurried to the front door. I threw on my shoes and was out a moment later. The late night store at the edge of campus, I was sure they sold some!

As I hurried past the dorm buildings up to campus, I couldn’t stop cursing about Rick and Barry.

Why’d they have to be such fucking dicks all day, every day!?

Even earlier today, they acted like total fucking assholes. While I was busy working on a project due in two weeks, they kept pestering me all evening.

“Whatcha doing there, Jake?”

“You working on your project on Saturday evening?”

“Why are you such a fucking nerd?”

Yeah right, I thought, not everyone’s got mommy and daddy paying for their tuition. No, some of us had to actually worry about their grades and rely on scholarships.

Yet, even after I told them I had to finish this, they didn’t leave up. They barged into my room repeatedly, annoyed me, and kept pestering me to join them on their night out. I knew damn well, they only took me along to use me as a wingman when hitting on girls.

I hate to say it though, but I eventually told them I’d come along. The condition was that they’d leave me alone all of next week, though. Of course they agreed, and of course I knew they didn’t mean any of it.

“Come on, dickweed, we’re going to be late!” Barry called out to me as I put on my shoes. With a sigh, I got myself a beer from the fridge and hurried after them.

On the subway they talked their usual talk. Parties, drinking and girls, girls, girls. Every once in a while, they pestered me about my experience with girls before they both started throwing around the word ‘virgin’ and high-fiving each other.

God, why had I come along again?

It wasn’t long before we found ourselves in the middle of a crowded club. The music was a mixture of shitty pop and over-tuned EDM. I hated it already.

Barry and Rick were right in their element, though, mingling on the dancefloor and hitting on girls.

I watched them for a bit before I propped down at the bar and ordered another beer. As I sat there, beer in hand, I couldn’t help but sigh. Once more I wondered why I put up with their antics.

“Bad night?” a voice spoke up from my right.

“Nah, it’s just,” I started but broke up when I saw the woman sitting next to me.

To say she was gorgeous would be an understatement.

For a few moments, I couldn’t help but stare at her. She giggled before she took a sip of her drink.

“You came here all by yourself?” she asked.

“Ah, no, I’m here with my, well, friends,” I brought out, “but they left me.”

She’d noticed how I’d mumbled the word ‘friends’ and eyed me curiously.

“Doesn’t sound like you’re too fond of those friends of yours,” she whispered conspiratorially.

I couldn’t help but sigh before I agreed with her. When I asked her what brought her to a club like this, she laughed and told me she liked to mingle, at least at times. We continued chatting, her talking all sensual and seductive while I was my usual awkward self.

It wasn’t long before my ‘friends’ noticed my new companion and joined us.

They plopped down to our right and left and outdid themselves in their attempts at charming her and excluding me from the conversation.

“You know, boys,” she started, “I’m talking to your friend here.”

With that, she put her hand on my leg and inched closer towards me, pushing herself against my body.

Rick and Barry’s jaws dropped at exactly the same time. For a while they kept up their spiel before they went on their search for easier prey.

“My, oh my, those two are something else,” she said amused, trailing after them.

It wasn’t long before she whispered sweet nothings into my ear and asked me if I’d like to get to a more intimate location.

With my head on standby, I blurted out that my dorm was a mere fifteen minutes away by subway. I regretted it instantly, thinking of my cluttered and cramped dorm room, but to my surprise she took me up on the offer.

Yet, it wasn’t so much my room that had me worried, it was Rick and Barry.

For a while now, the two of them had kept watching us. I knew it must’ve stung that I’d ‘gotten a girl’ while the two of them hadn’t ‘conquered’ any of their own.

The moment we went to leave, the two of them hurried along, clearly intent of ruining things for me.

While we were on the subway, they tried once more to impress the nameless beauty next to me, but she didn’t give them any attention.

The moment we’d made it back, she pushed me into my room, the room she was still waiting in.

And now, I wasn’t in that fuck room fucking, no, I was on my way to the goddamn late night store at the edge of campus!

Once I was past the dorms and had crossed two streets, I could already see the store’s dim light. As I barged inside, throwing the door, the cashier started at me.

“Ah, shit, sorry, I’m, never mind,” I stammered and began traversing the shelves.

Shit, why’s the place so big? Where the fuck are the condoms?

I moved past rows of cheap beer and equally cheap liquor, past microwave meals and canned goods, but I didn’t find any condoms.

“Fucking hell, where are they,” I cursed to myself, but in my erratic state I couldn’t seem to find them.

Eventually, I gave up and hurried back to the cashier who was busy arguing with two guys who must’ve entered the store after me.

“Excuse me, can you tell me where the,” I started, trying to push myself to the front, but found myself face to face with the two guys who were clearly drunk.

“Yo, how about you wait till it’s your turn,” one of them slurred at me.

“Shit, sorry, I just want to-“

“Listen pal,” the other one started moving up in front of me. “How about you shut the hell up and let us get our shit, all right?”

The other guy had already turned back to the cashier, laying into him about the price of a bottle of booze.

“…yeah man, no way I’m gonna pay ten freaking bucks for that shit! I get it for five at the freaking liquor store!”

“Then go there,” the cashier said with a shrug.

“Well, it’s fucking closed asshole, that’s why we’re here!”

Another shrug.

“Guess you don’t want it then.”

With that he was about to take the bottle from the guy’s hand, but he jerked it back instantly. Under a tirade of heavy curses, he brought out his wallet and threw the cashier a bill.

“There you go, asshole,” the guy spat at him before the two of them turned and made their way from the store. Not without elbowing me aside.

“Thanks, be sure to come again,” the cashier called after them with a grin on his face.

“Yeah, fuck you too, asshole!” I heard them scream from outside before they threw the door.

“So, what are you looking for?” he asked, turning to me.

“Oh, eh, I was wondering if you had any, well condoms,” I brought out.

The dude couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“Big night, eh? They are over there, second row to the left, near the back, a little hidden.”

In an instant, I hurried to where he’d pointed.

The moment I reached them, I stared at the various packs in utter confusion.

It was a mesmerizing ocean of sparkling colors. Rhino Rubbers, one pack was called while the one next to them sprouted the term Strawberry Slippers. What the hell’s all that stuff? Fuck!

After a few seconds of staring at the mess in front of me dumbfounded, I grabbed a pack of the most vanilla looking ones and hurried back to the cashier.

He scanned them, called out the price, but when I brought out my debit card, he shook his head.

“Sorry, but our card reader’s busted, cash only for the moment.”

I stared at him in disbelief and began rummaging through my wallet, then my pockets, but I still came out short.

“Fuck, come on man, can’t you like write it up or something? I swear, I’m going to be back first thing tomorrow and give you the money, hell, I’ll give you a tip and-“

“Sorry, I can tell you really need those, but no write ups, store police. There’s an ATM behind the IT building, right next to the bus station though.”

“Behind the IT building? Shit, that’s like… fuck, all right, I’ll be back, okay?”

“Sure thing,” he said as I rushed from the store.

“Fucking goddamn fucking fuck!” I cursed as I ran past lecture halls and faculty buildings.

All right, calm down, the IT building is to the right of… shit. Where the fuck am I even going?

I ripped out my phone and cross-checked my location. Of course, I’d ran into a completely different direction.

Fuck! Now it’s gonna take me at least five minutes to get there! With the time it took me to get to the store and now this… fuck! Please, please let her still be there when I get back, please, I prayed to any and all gods.

Following the directions of the phone, I finally made it to the IT building. I rushed past it and I could already see the bus station and soon the ATM behind it. Thank fucking god!

Without giving the two figures at the station any notice, I hurried to the ATM and inserted my card.

My fingers flew over the screen while I cursed at the machine to hurry the fuck up and give me my freaking money.

“Yo, dude, you got a light?” someone called out from me behind.

Ignoring the drunk guy, whose voice sounded a bit too familiar, I punched my PIN into the keypad, shuffling around.

Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder.

“Hey, I’m talking to,” the voice started, but broke up.

“You’re that asshole from the store!”

“What?” I asked, as I grabbed my money.

“Yo, Alex, it’s the guy from the store! The scrawny asshole who tried to cut in line!”

“Hey, sorry for that, but I’ve got to-“

Before I could even finish to apologize, he pushed me back against the ATM

“Oh yeah, you’re sorry?”

Instead of answering, I pushed myself past drunk guy number one, only to crash right into the second one who’d come to join in the fun.

The bottle of booze he’d been holding slipped from his fingers and crashed to the floor. For a second, the only audible sound was the shattering of glass. All our eyes wandered to the growing puddle of alcohol.

“What the fuck man?!” he screamed up.

“Shit, sorry, I didn’t,” was all I brought out before he hit me in the stomach.

Pain shot through my body and I stumbled back.

“What you gonna do about it, asshole? Eh!?”

Another hit and this time, I slumped to the floor. When I was about to get up, I was pushed down once again.

“Yo, I’m talking to you asshole!” he screamed up again.

Right at that moment, a window opened on a building nearby. A tired and furious woman demanded what all the ruckus was about.

The two drunks turned and started throwing insults at her.

While the three of them were yelling at each other, I pushed myself back to my feet and booked it.

It wasn’t long before the two drunks noticed and came after me.

Shit, how the fuck did it come to that?! I could’ve been getting laid right now, and instead…

“Where you think you going, asshole?!” one of them screamed after me.

I rushed past the IT building, then towards the adjacent chemistry building, but when I turned the two of them were still coming after me.

Then in a swift motion, I turned a corner and hurried up the stairs to the roof at the side of the chemistry building. Up there, I did my best to duck away so they wouldn’t notice me.

I saw them hurry on, past the stairs before they came to a stop and scanned the area.

“Where’d he go?” one of them asked.

The other was still scanning the area before a tirade of curses followed.

Shit, fucking leave already, assholes!

For a while they kept walking around, trying to figure out where the hell I went before they turned to leave.

I forced myself to wait for at least half a minute, counting down the seconds.

Once I was done, I jumped down the stairs and rushed over campus back to the late night store.

The cashier looked up when I barged inside again, panting.

“Well what do you know, you made it?”

I nodded, walked up to him and handed him the money without saying a word. He handed me the pack of condoms and my change.

“Good luck,” he joked.

“Thanks,” I finally brought out.

Once I was back outside, I couldn’t believe the night I was having.

I almost laughed when I looked at my phone and noticed that more than half an hour had passed. Knowing my luck, there was no way she’d waited for me that long. Hell, she probably thought I pussied out or god knows what.

“Fucking hell,” I cursed up.

Then, on my way from campus to the dorms, I noticed a lonely figure making their way down the streets.

From afar, I noticed the long brown hair, the tight dress and the sensual walk.

Oh god, no. Fucking no!

“Hey,” I called out and rushed towards her. “Hey, wait up, wait up, I’m sorry, I didn’t-“

Yet when I reached her, when she turned around, I broke up.

It was her, but at the same time it wasn’t.

Her hands and fingers looked different in the dark of the night. They were long, elongated and spidery. Her hair was wild and disheveled.

For a moment I cringed back, as she seemed to grow, seemed to become some hunched over, birdlike monstrosity.

“My, oh, my,” a distorted version of her sweet, sensual voice started. “You actually came back, lover boy.”

“Yes, I,” but I couldn’t go on.

Her mouth hung open, was distorted to a ghastly grin. I could see long pointy teeth, saw the blood covering her lips and dripping from her chin.

“It’s too bad,” she cackled as she stepped up to me.

I was frozen, paralyzed by fear as her hungry eyes stared deep into mine. Her long, pointed fingers reached out, and as much as I tried, I couldn’t escape her embrace.

For a moment, her appearance shifted once more. She seemed to grow, seemed to seep up all the surrounding darkness. Her head pushed forward, her lips brushing against my ear.

“You know, your friends weren’t all that bad, but I really would’ve liked to taste you,” she whispered before she sunk her fangs into my ear.

When I cringed back, cursing in pain, she giggled again. Once more I saw the long, needle-like teeth in her mouth.

“Maybe another time,” she said before she turned and vanished into the darkness.

When she was gone, all strength left my body, and I slumped to the ground in sheer and utter confusion.

When I heard chaos erupting down by the dorms and when I heard the police sirens, I knew whose blood she’d been covered in and I knew what must’ve happened to Barry and Rick.

As I sat there, I stared at the little box of condoms in my hand, the little box that had caused me so much trouble and that had ultimately saved my life.

And as I sat there, I couldn’t help but laugh and laugh and laugh.