Well, guess there’s a reason you’re here. We all have our bad habits, don’t we?
Did the title catch your attention? Are you trying to break free of this nasty little habit of yours?
Well, here a few tips.
The first thing’s pretty obvious. I’m doing it right now. Believe it or not, but writing about it helps quite a bit. If only to keep your mind busy with something else, typing away for that matter.
Now let’s get serious here. The first thing you need to know is that the urge to keep at this habit will only persist for a few days, a week tops. After that, the nagging feeling drifts off, and you’re free, well almost. Try it!
Those first few days though, they can be tough, really though. There’s the shaking, the heart raising, the sweating and of course our good friend anxiety. You’ll constantly want to do it again, and at times you might even do. Been there, done that. Once you’ve made it through, things will get so much easier.
A little piece of advice though, even after weeks, if not month or years, you can have a relapse. There’ll be this nasty little voice in your mind, scratching at your consciousness.
“What would it feel like now?”
“Just once isn’t so bad?”
“It won’t happen again.”
It’s mostly a psychological issue.
Another thing might happen though. You might recall the good, old times. That night when you were outside, going for a walk to indulge in your habit. Or that night you spent with a certain someone and you wanted to make it a little bit more interesting. Oh even as I write this, I can hear the voice in my head, urging me to go back and to relive those feelings. If you’re in the same boat, be strong and surprise it. It’s not worth it. After all, the past is the past. The nagging little voice is only out to trick you.
As we all know though, it’s not all a psychological issue. At least those of you who are going through the same thing as I do will know.
There’s this nasty odor on your cloth that you can’t seem to get rid of. The smell on your hands and of course the taste in your mouth. You can do whatever you want, those things will stay and linger for quite a bit. You can wash your hands over and over again, yet the smell is still there.
You might also notice that your eyes are eyes are a tad bit wider than usual. There could be a popped blood vessel or two. Try it, go look at the mirror, I’m sure they’re there. It’s normal when you try to kick a tough habit.
Now if you notice these things, others will too, of course. They might ask you why you’re so nervous or jittery. And of course, our friend anxiety is there as well, right at our doorstep. Loud noises, someone tapping your shoulder, someone screaming nearby, all those things can be a little too much during this first week. It’s best to tell the people around you about your little predicament.
Otherwise, those influences could send you straight back to your little habit. Just once, to calm down a little. You have to be strong. I’m sure you can do it.
The most important thing though is your mindset. You need to understand that you have to do it for yourself. You can’t do it for friends, your family or even your lover. That’s not how it works.
Never, I repeat, never make it about others or how you can make things better for them. That’s the easiest way to get right back to it once you’re alone. I can’t count how often I made the same mistake.
You need to realize, first and foremost, that this habit is bad for you. That’s the only way out.
You know, I’ve been preaching to you for so long, yet here I am. It hasn’t even been an hour since I fell right back to my little habit. Oh I know it’s terrible. I know I really have to stop it.
As I’m typing these words, I can still smell the blood. I can still taste it. I’ve washed my hands countless times, yet the smell persists, there’s nothing I can do. I know I have to wash my cloth, but I know that they’re most likely ruined. Blood really has such a strong odor, and at times it just won’t come off.
Well, who the hell am I lying too? At times the urge is just too strong. On certain days, I can’t help but go out into the night and kill again.
So, if you guys have a few other tricks or tips, feel free to put them in the comments down below. I’m sure to check them out later.
I’ll be back in a few. For now, though, I really need to get rid of this body.
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