Michael

I first met Michael during a supplementary lecture at university. I only attended it for a few easy credits. Michael, I would learn, was in the same boat as me.

Over the first two months, we bonded and eventually went on a date together.

He wasn’t exactly my type, to be honest. Usually, I liked the outgoing, conversational type. Michael, on the other hand, seemed to be a true introvert.

During the very first lecture, he sat at the end of the small lecture hall. He listened and didn’t interact with anyone.

It was only after a while that he warmed up to the rest of us. We exchanged a few sparse words, but we hit it off pretty well.

As time passed, I learned how similar our interests were. I loved photography and French literature and soon found out that he enjoyed both of these things as well. It was quite odd for an engineering major, but also intriguing.

It didn’t take long for us to become quite friendly, hanging out at the cafeteria after the lecture was over. Soon it became a bit more. We officially started our relationship after our second date.

Things were perfect, at least, for a while.

There was one thing that was quite off-putting about Michael, his jealousy. I wanted to hang out with friends? He’d asked if other guys were there if so he’d tag along. I was meeting up with other students to work on a project? Same thing.

Even after we talked about it, his attitude didn’t change much. Eventually, it turned into a big argument, and he promised to better himself.

I knew it should’ve been a major red flag, but I guess I was too enamored to see what was going on.

For a while, I believed in his promise. He didn’t seem to be bothered about me going out on my own anymore or at least, he hid his jealousy really well. Either way, I was happy about it.

That was until the night I went out with a group of high school friends. We had a few drinks at a bar and wanted to catch up on old times. After a while, a female friend pointed at a figure near the end of the bar. Apparently, someone had been watching me for a while.

The moment the guy glanced over again, I noticed him instantly. It was Michael. I walked up to him and flipped out. At first he tried to tell me it was all a coincidence, but in the end, he admitted he’d been following me around.

I didn’t talk to him for a week.

When I finally replied to his messages, he pleaded with me to give him another chance. I reluctantly agreed to meet up in person, and he admitted he went too far. It was all because he loved me so much he said.

Afterward, he took me out on a fantastic date, and I was dumb enough to forgive him. What can I say, I was a silly girl, and I was in love.

That was, until a few weeks later.

I’d stayed over at his place. In the morning he went out to get us some breakfast.

While I put on some coffee, I remembered that I needed to send an email to one of my professors.

I looked around for my phone, but of course, I couldn’t find it. I tend to be a bit of a scatterbrain when it comes to my phone, often forgetting where I put it. It didn’t help that Michael’s apartment was so damn big.

After searching for a while, I went to Michael’s laptop.

He didn’t like it when I used his things, but since he wasn’t around, I told myself it would be alright. It would only take a minute.

I opened up his browser, logged into my account, and began typing out the email. That’s when I saw a bookmark folder in the menu bar. The caption simply said, ‘Maria.’ I smiled a bit, wondering what he’d saved in there. Was it the French poetry site I’d sent him? Or maybe it was one of the photography blogs I’d told him about.

At first, I told myself to ignore it and not to snoop around. Eventually, though, my curiosity won over.

What I found made my heart drop.

There were hundreds of bookmarks in that folder. There were some about French poetry and literature, others about photography, but there was so much more. I found my social media accounts, my account on Reddit, the Facebook groups I’d joined and links to a few Evernote documents.

The first one was titled ‘Things she likes.’ The document consisted of a complete breakdown of everything I enjoyed. Bands, movies, books, hobbies. It even included things I’d never told him about. Another was a breakdown of my daily and weekly schedule, my classes, my part-time job, the places I frequented and information on all my friends.

I looked through them in a state of shock. I realized what this was. Michael had created a profile of me!

He’d done all this to get closer to me, to make an impression of me? This was sick, disgusting!

I started to look through the rest of his bookmarks, and it wasn’t long before I found other, similar folders. There was one named ‘Lauren’ and another one named ‘Kim.’ Both of them were almost as detailed as mine!

This freaking creep!

I was so captivated and shocked by all this that I almost missed him returning home. The moment he opened the door, I quickly closed his laptop and started to search for my phone once more.

The moment I found it, I pretended that I’d received a text message and told him I had to leave.

“Michael, I’m sorry, I just got a message by Professor Lindeman! I totally forgot that I’m supposed to meet up with him this morning!” I lied and started to get dressed.

“Really? You’ve got to leave right now? I was about to make us breakfast. I even got the croissants you like so much!”

I forced myself to smile at him. “Oh babe, that’s so sweet! I’d love to stay, but you know how Lindeman can be. God, I can’t stand him at times!”

Good going, Maria, good going. I gathered my things and was about to walk to the front door. Before I could, he came over to me and put his arms around me. When he gave me a kiss, I almost cringed back.

The moment I was at the front door, he seemed to notice something.

“Hey, have you been on my laptop?” he called out.

“What? Don’t be silly,” I said, laughing a little.

“Then why’s it closed? I never close it.”

Shit, I cursed to myself. Maria, you stupid, stupid idiot. I hadn’t even closed the browser I realized.

Before he was even at the laptop, I put my shoes on.

“I really got to go, sorry,” I rambled on and opened the door.

“Why?” I heard him ask in a voice completely different from his usual one. It was strained, angry and… scary.

“Why the fuck did you touch my laptop?! Didn’t I tell you never to do that?!”

I didn’t answer. Instead, I rushed from the apartments and hurried down the stairs. I had to get away. He called after me, but I didn’t stop.

Once I was outside, I mingled between the pedestrians and got away as fast as I could. Still, I looked over my shoulder countless times to see if he was coming after me. Thankfully he didn’t.

From that day onward I avoided going near any of the places we’d used to hang out at. I didn’t even go to that supplementary lecture anymore.

It wasn’t much use, though. I ran into him countless times. Each time he told me it wasn’t what it had looked like. He’d only put it together once we started dating. It was to prepare for our anniversary. He wanted to surprise me and made a massive list of all the things I enjoyed. This time I didn’t believe any of his lies. Instead, I told him he was acting creepy and that I didn’t want to see him ever again.

His advances didn’t stop. At first, they were civil, but soon they became outright stalking.

Again and again, I saw him. He followed me to my lectures, to the cafeteria and even followed me when I was hanging out with friends… Finally, one day, I exploded. I screamed at him in the middle of a bar to leave me the hell alone. I threatened to call the cops and called him a stalker in front of everyone present. He was kicked out by the bouncers, and a male friend escorted me home.

It didn’t help much. From then on, he didn’t approach me directly anymore, but I often noticed him nearby, watching me. At the same time, I started to get weird friend requests on Facebook, and my Reddit posts were flooded with strange comments. I knew it was him.

The day I found him inside of my apartment, I finally informed the police. I’d forgotten that he knew where I kept my spare keys, but I’d have never guessed he’d go that far.

It was early in the evening, and I returned from my part-time job to find him in the kitchen, preparing dinner. It was our anniversary, he said. He’d planned it all, and it would be perfect. Just like in old times. I’d forgiven him by now, hadn’t I?

I ran and didn’t stop until I reached a friend’s place. From there, I called the police. The moment we returned to the apartment, Michael was long gone.

I told them everything. The way we met, our relationship, my discovery, the stalking, and what he said when I found him inside. For the time being, they said they’d watch the area. They urged me to get my locks changed and to file a restraining order against him as soon as possible.

My landlord wasn’t pleased about the whole thing. When I provided the police documents, he reluctantly agreed to have the locks changed.

In the following days, I filed for a restraining order. I didn’t see Michael throughout the whole ordeal, yet it took quite a while before it was put into effect. His parents were wealthy and influential. They tried their best to block my request and to sweep the whole thing under the carpet.

It didn’t work. Once the restraining order was put into effect, I was happy to put this whole thing behind me.

Yet, things aren’t always that simple. At times I still saw Michael and university. It was never for long, always from afar, and the moment he noticed me, he vanished again. Every time it happened, I shivered.

Some of my friends advised me to talk to the police about it, but a university is a public space. We were both students here. There was no way I could get him banned from campus.

As the weeks went by, the whole thing seemed to slowly settle down. I still saw Michael here and there, but he didn’t seem to care anymore.

I wish I could tell you this story ended here. I wish I could’ve checked this off as nothing but a run-in with an obsessive stalker. However, things turned much, much worse.

Eventually, I didn’t see Michael anymore. At least that’s what I thought. Yet, there was this strange feeling.

At first, I struck it off as an overactive imagination. There was no dark figure nearby. There was no one following me. It’s all in your head Maria, I told myself again and again. When a friend pointed out he saw someone as well, I knew it had to be him.

It was always at night, in the dark, but it was clear someone was following me around.

Michael was a smart guy, fiercely smart even, top of his class, honors and all that. So, of course, I never caught him.

I wasn’t sure what he was up to. Was he just watching me, or was he up to something else? I told the police, and they said they’d make sure I was safe, but there wasn’t anything else they could do. I had no proof that it was him other than this ‘gut feeling’ of mine.

One day a coworker of mine approached me near the end of my shift. She asked me if I had a new boyfriend. When I said no, she seemed a bit confused. She told me there’d been a guy outside, clearly waiting for me. When we checked things out again, he was long gone.

Yet again, I couldn’t do anything. I had no proof at all.

On the way home, I was anxious the whole time. I hurried from the station to my apartment, looking around constantly. Was he nearby right now?

The moment I opened my mailbox I freaked out. Neatly stacked between my mail was a small little note. With shaking hands, I opened it. There was only one line written on it.

What’s true terror?

I jerked around, almost waiting to see his grinning face right behind me, but I was all alone.

I rushed inside and locked the door. I was panting heavily, almost shaking. This had to be him!

I called the police and told them what had happened. They sent someone over to check out the note and said they’d handle the situation. If the note were indeed by Michael, he’d be in a lot of trouble. I was relieved when I heard this.

This relief quickly changed to utter frustration, when they informed me that yet again there was no proof. Michael hadn’t been seen on the security cameras in the building, and he had an alibi for the day. I screamed at them that someone else must’ve delivered it instead of him. The only thing they did, though, was to ask me if I could think of someone else. They didn’t seem to take me serious at all!

A few days later, I got another message. This one wasn’t in my mailbox, though. It was during one of my lectures that I halfheartedly checked my email. I noticed one by an unknown sender. Probably spam I thought, but I clicked it anyway. Ever since I deleted an important email by a fellow project member, I was careful about it.

The email consisted of a single line.

 Is it the fear you feel every day?

I knew right away who’d sent it. I jumped off my seat and almost dropped my laptop. The whole ordeal prompted looks from everyone and a joking remark by the professor. I apologized and sat back down, but I couldn’t concentrate anymore. Why was he doing this? What the hell did he want from me?

I blocked the sender and deleted the email. I knew it wouldn’t be of much use. If he wanted to send another one, he could just create a new account. Still, I wanted this tiny victory.

Things got worse every day. Whenever I walked around campus, I had this feeling that he was around. I felt watched constantly. Was he hiding behind that corner over there? Was he inside that building watching me from behind the curtains? I could never be sure.

This whole situation started to take its toll on me. Whenever I heard someone walk up to me, I thought it was him.

When I confided in a friend, she was visibly shocked but told me this was exactly what he wanted. To scare me, nothing else. He wouldn’t risk doing anything to me, he couldn’t. It was all tactics. I knew what she meant, but ‘what if’? What if he was actually waiting for a chance to… do whatever he planned?

When I returned home that day, I knew something wasn’t right. Did you ever enter a familiar place and you knew instantly that something was wrong? That’s what I felt that day.

I’m a very orderly person. I keep my place clean. I know where each and every item belongs and where I left it. I’m almost pedantic in a way.

It didn’t take me long to notice a small ceramic plate, resting on a cupboard in my hallway. It wasn’t supposed to be there. Its usual place was on the living room table! Why the hell was it here? I hadn’t touched it! I knew I hadn’t!

I rushed into the living room and saw it right away. A small note was resting in the place the plate normally would.

Is it the paranoia slowly taking hold of your mind?

I cried out in utter shock. He’d been here again, inside of my apartment! There was no doubt about it!

Or was he still inside? For a moment, I froze and listened. Then my instincts kicked in, and I ran from the apartment.

I rushed down the stairs and out of the building, but I didn’t make it far. Right next to the entrance, I collapsed into a shivering, crying mess. How the hell had he made it inside? How the hell had he gotten a hold of the key? What the hell was it he wanted!?

This time the police took things seriously. They checked the whole place but found no trace of Michael. They also found no hint of a break in. For all they knew, he either had a key, or he must’ve picked the lock.

The police checked my place for fingerprints but found nothing. When they checked the security footage though, they saw someone sneaking up to my apartment. They didn’t see his face, but the note and everything else pointed at no other than Michael.

I wasn’t there when they took him in. I didn’t want to see his face, nor his creepy smile. No, I didn’t want to see him at all. All I wanted was to know that he was in custody and I’d be safe.

When they confirmed that Michael had been the perpetrator and was in serious trouble, I was more relieved than I’d been in weeks, or even month.

Was this whole thing finally over?

For the first time in a long while, I was able to sleep through the night. No dreams, no paranoia, just sleep.

This morning, however, I woke up to something resting on my nightstand. At first, I told myself it was nothing. There was nothing there, and I was still half asleep. I closed my eyes and prayed before I opened them again. When I looked, the small note was still lying there. I started shaking, and when I read it, the tears streamed from my face.

True terror is hope. The hope that you’ll ever truly get away from me.

Mr. Williams

A week after we’d officially moved into our new house, an older, lanky man appeared at our front door.

“Who is it?” my husband Joe called out from the living room, busy setting up furniture.

“An old man, probably a neighbor,” I answered.

With that, I went and opened the door.

“Hello there, nice to meet you! I’m Karen,” I greeted him.

I reached out my hand, but the man completely ignored it. For a few awkward seconds, he just stood there, staring at me, before he opened his mouth.

“Are you looking for a gardener?”

Okay, this is weird, I thought. Sure, we had a huge front yard and garden, but why did he turn up like this?

“Not really, thank you. Are you living nearby?”

“Yes, nearby. You sure you don’t need a gardener? I’d be happy to help you with that garden of yours.”

“I don’t think we need any help. We’re just settling in right now, and we can’t afford to-“

“You don’t have to pay me. I’d be happy to do it for free.”

“What?” I blurted out.

What the hell was up with this guy?

“Well, that garden looks like it needs some work, so-“

“Look, mister, I appreciate the offer. I really do, but I have to decline, all right?”

For a moment, his face grew hard, and I was sure he’d explode at me, but then he simply nodded and left.

“Well, have a nice day, too,” I muttered under my breath.

Once I’d closed the door, I joined Joe in the living room.

“So? Was it a neighbor?”

“Honestly? I’ve got no idea. That guy was pretty weird.”

I told Joe about the encounter, but he only laughed.

“Who knows, maybe he’s one of those people who can’t stand to look at an overgrown yard?”

In the end, we both shrugged it off, and when our daughter Sarah entered the room, I didn’t think about it anymore.

“Mommy, can you help me put up the pictures in my room?”

“Of course, honey,” I answered with a bright smile, and followed her upstairs.

The next day, I found Joe at the window, looking outside. He was cursing to himself.

“You’ve got to be kidding me. What the hell’s that guy doing?”

When I looked outside, I recognized the old man from the day before.

“That’s him! That’s the guy who was here yesterday.”

“Okay, I’ll go talk to him.”

With that, Joe made his way outside and approached the man. I quickly followed behind him.

“Excuse me?” Joe called out, his voice firm, but the man didn’t react.

Instead, he was busy cutting the hedge at the side of our garden.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

This time the old man turned to us, shears still in hand.

“Taking care of the hedge,” he stated matter-of-factly. “It really needed some trimming. See those branches here? They are-“

“Look, my wife told you yesterday we don’t need a gardener, okay? You can’t just come here and… do it on your own.”

The old man just smiled at him.

“Oh, you don’t have to pay me.”

“That’s not the point, all right?” Joe started, and I could hear him getting angrier. “Leave. Now. And if you show up again, I’m calling the cops.”

For a moment, his eyes wandered from Jo to me and back to Joe before he picked up his tools and walked off.

“Mommy, who was that?” Sarah called out from the front door.

“Oh, just someone living nearby,” I answered.

She nodded and accepted it in the way only little kids can.

“You think I should call the cops after all?”

I considered it, but then I shook my head.

“No, he’s pretty weird, but seems harmless. Only if he shows up again.”

As the days passed, we finally finished furnishing the house. At this point, I decided it was time to take care of the garden. The old man had been right. It really was unkempt, and I didn’t want him to show up again. I decided to start with some rose bushes. They’d always been a favorite of mine, and Sarah absolutely loved them. We had a lot of fun that afternoon planting them while Joe was at work.

When I went out again the next day, Sarah suddenly walked up to me.

“Mommy, the plants moved!” she called out in excitement.

I smiled at her and asked her what she meant. Instead of answering, she pointed at where we’d planted the rose bushes. My heart skipped a beat. They were empty, and nothing but soft soil was left. The rose bushes themselves had been replanted a couple of meters away. I told myself it must’ve been Joe, but he was at work. He didn’t have time for something like that. Then something in my mind clicked. Don’t tell me…

When Joe was home, I told him what I thought had happened. He was visibly upset, more so than I was.

“That’s it. We’ve got to do something about this,” he cursed.

He called the cops, and once they arrived, we told them about the whole thing. They were confused and weren’t sure if we were joking. We assured them, though, that a random man had been working in our garden. They took the story down, but told us there wasn’t much they could do. In the end, they told us to give them a call should the man show up again. As they drove off, I could imagine them having a good laugh at this weird story. Hell, even I thought the entire thing was ridiculous.

I couldn’t sleep that night. We hadn’t seen the man, so the only time he could’ve done it was when we were asleep. Again and again, I got up, walking over to the window, scanning the front yard and the garden, but I saw nothing.  It must’ve been past three in the morning when I finally dozed off.

When Joe woke me, I knew the man had been here again.

“He trimmed half the damned hedge,” he said as he led me to the window. “There you see it?”

He was right. The hedge on the left side of the garden was nicely trimmed. Even the twigs and branches he’d cut off were gone.

“This is just so strange,” I said, and couldn’t help but laugh. “What the hell’s wrong with that man?”

Joe didn’t say a thing. Instead, he went downstairs to make himself a cup of coffee, muttering to himself.

For the next couple of days, I kept an almost constant watch of the garden, but I never saw the man. It was as if he was waiting for us to fall asleep, only to sneak into our garden and… take care of it. By that point, he’d trimmed the hedges, mowed the grass, and had even planted a lilac in the center of the garden.

“You got to admit, it looks much better now,” I mumbled one morning, still half-asleep.

“That’s not the point,” Joe protested. “We can’t have someone sneaking into our garden in the middle of the night. What if he’s…? I don’t know a freaking weirdo or something?”

Eventually, Joe and I decided to both stay up. He was right. We really had to do something about this. It was about four in the morning when Joe rocked me awake.

“There he is!”

I saw him right away. He’d brought an assortment of gardening tools, a potted plant, and even fertilizer. For a moment, I watched, almost in a trance, as he dug a hole for the plant he’d brought. At this point, Joe had enough, and stormed out of the house. I ran after him, calling the police on my mobile phone.

“You… what the hell do you think you’re doing?” Joe yelled at the man.

“Taking care of the garden. You really didn’t-“

“All right, buddy, what the hell are you talking about? Why the hell are you in our garden at four in the freaking morning?” Joe laid into him, while I told the officers our address.

“I’m just turning the garden into what it used to be. The way she’d wanted me to.”

“What are you… she?”

“Maria, my little angel Maria,” he said in a low voice, smiling faintly, as his eyes wandered the garden.

“Who’s Maria?” I cut in.

The old man sighed before he put down his gardening tools.

“We used to live here, the Williams family. That was my wife and me, and our two daughters Lizzy and Maria. Maria, she was… sick, and couldn’t go out often, but whenever she did, she was always in the garden. That girl, she loved flowers more than anything,” he said, his voice somber. “She always said she wanted the garden to always stay like this, but…”

His voice trailed off, and we found him staring at nothing.

“But, what?” I asked.

“She passed away. After that… things weren’t he the same anymore. My wife couldn’t handle it. Our family broke apart, and she moved away, taking Lizzy with her. But I couldn’t… I had to stay, if only for Maria.”

I was puzzled when I heard this, but before I could interject anything, the old man went on.

“Eventually, I couldn’t pay the rent anymore, and was evicted. For the past fifteen years, I tried… I tried so many times. Whenever people moved into the house, I tried to talk to them, tried to restore the garden, but they always chased me away.”

He laughed a little after he’d said that.

“Now that I’m old, though, there isn’t much left for me. I just… really want to see my little girl happy again, wherever she is,” he ended.

By that point, the police had arrived. The two officers looked up when they saw us with the old man.

“So that’s the ominous gardener?” one of them asked.

Joe nodded.

“Sir, what are you doing here?”

“No, officer, I’m sorry, but it’s all right. We actually settled the issue just now,” I interjected.

The officers eyed me suspiciously, and Joe was equally surprised.

“What do you mean, miss?” one officer asked, not bothering to hide his annoyance.

“It was all just a misunderstanding. Mr. Williams here is our new gardener. I’m sorry, but I guess we got it all mixed up.”

The two of them were still confused, but eventually gave Joe and me a long lecture about wasting valuable police resources before they drove off.

“All right Mr. Williams, how about you come back tomorrow afternoon, and we have a talk about everything?” I finally asked.

The old man nodded, and after gathering his goods, left. Joe was still staring at me, and he protested, of course, but after having heard the old man’s story, I couldn’t just chase him away like all those other people had done.

The talk with Mr. Williams went nice. Sure, he was quite weird, but he didn’t seem unfriendly at all. Most importantly, he seemed to have a decent idea about what to do with our garden. In the end, I decided to give him a chance.

At first, I mostly watched him as he planted the flowers and bushes I’d bought for the garden. In time, though, I warmed up to him. Many afternoons, while Joe was at work, Sarah and I hung out with him and helped him with his work. Our little girl grew especially fond of the wacky old man. It wasn’t long before she absolutely adored him, and the old man, in turn, seemed to enjoy having her around.

On certain days, while I was reading a book on the front porch, I’d see the two of them joke around with one another. On another day, he’d be kneeling beside her, showing her how to plant the bulbs in that gentle, soothing voice of his.

Yet there were a few moments that made me slightly uneasy. Whenever he talked to her, he always stood closer to her, almost too close, his hand resting on her shoulder or her head. Occasionally, I’d catch him staring at her for a tad bit too long. Sometimes, he’d even take her hand, leading her around the garden, as he explained the meaning of the flowers to her. Eventually, the old man seemed to notice my unease, and walked up to me, giving me this reserved smile, clearly embarrassed about it.

“She’s just like my little Maria, so sometimes, I feel like back then, when she was still around…”

“Oh god, Mr. Williams, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean-“

The old man smiled and just shook his head.

“No Karen, it’s all right. It’s just… hard, you know?”

I guess that was when I truly bonded with the old man. While he was weird, he seemed one of the sweetest people I’d ever met, the perfect babysitter for Sarah. That’s why I left her with him last Saturday. Joe was busy working on one of his many work related projects. When I was about to prepare dinner, I noticed we’d run out of a few things.

“Sarah, do you want to come with me to the grocery store?”

“Nuh-uh. I want to stay with Mr. Williams and the flowers!” she answered, pouty.

The old man and I both had a good laugh about it.

“You sure you can handle this little devil all by yourself?” I asked, turning to the old man.

“Of course. I could use a few helping hands with all this work anyway,” he said with a big grin on his face.

At the grocery store, I ran into one of our neighbors, an old woman named Linda.

“Karen,” she greeted me. “I must say, you’ve really outdone yourself with that garden of yours!”

“Oh, thank you, but it wasn’t me. It was our new gardener.”

“Either way, it’s beautiful. I’m sure little Lizzy would’ve been happy to see it like that.”

“Wait, what do you mean?”

“Oh, Karen, it’s such a sad story. Back in the day, a family lived in that house, and one of the girls died right there in that garden.”

“I know about the story, but her name was Maria, wasn’t it?”

“Maria? No. Maria was always sick, but Lizzy was the one who broke her neck when she fell off that tree.”

What the hell was she talking about? This made no sense. Mr. Williams had told us he did it all for his daughter Maria, and that she’d been the one who died. I even remember how he told me all about that unfortunate fall because of one of her dizzy spells.

“But Mr. Williams said it was Maria who’d died there.”

“That’s impossible, dear,” the old lady said in a confused voice. “Mr. Williams died three years ago?”

“But… He’s right there, at our house! He’s our gardener!”

The old lady’s face turned as white as a sheet.

“No. Karen. That’s impossible! Old Mr. Williams died at the retirement home. I was at the funeral and…”

I didn’t listen anymore, I couldn’t. If Mr. Williams was dead, then who was that man in our garden? Why this entire story? Why pretend to be him? Then I thought about Sarah. The way he’d talked to her, the way he’d played and joked with her, and the way he used to lead her around the garden. How he’d always watched her. Oh god, I thought he’d seen his daughter in her, but, but…

I rushed from the story without any of the groceries and dialed Joe’s number. Come on, come on, please answer the phone, Joe! Finally, after a dozen rings, he answered.

“Joe! Where are you? Where’s Sarah?” I screamed into the phone.

“She must be out in the garden with Mr. Williams? Why, what’s-?”

“Go and get her!”

“Karen, what’s-?”

“Just do it, Joe! Go and get her!”

I heard him walk through the house and finally open the front door. Oh please let her bet here, please.

“Sarah? Sarah, where are you?”

“Joe, what’s going on?”

“I can’t see her. Sarah!”

“Joe, where’s Mr. Williams?”

I heard him shuffle around, calling out for the old man, then again for our daughter. With every second, his voice grew more and more agitated.

“I can’t find them, Karen. Where-?”

That’s when I hung up and called the police. I was in hysterics at this point, screaming into the phone and having to repeat myself multiple times before they understood what was going on. When they finally did, they were as alarmed as me and sent out multiple patrols to search the area.

Thankfully, it didn’t take long for them to find Sarah and Mr. Williams, or whoever the man was. They’d been holding hands, and he’d already led her halfway down the street, just a few hundred meters away from an abandoned warehouse. Only a block, I thought, when I heard this, only a block and I might have lost her forever.

When the police took him in, they found out who the man really was. His name was Tom Edwards. He was a registered sex offender from half a state away. The man had arrived in our town about a month ago. He’d stayed at a cheap, rundown motel nearby. It was by sheer chances he saw us move in and also noticed Sarah. When he learned about the history of the house, he hatched a plan. Knowing we’d just moved in, and wouldn’t be aware of the story, he decided to pretend to be old Mr. Williams. That day, when I went grocery shopping, he finally got his chance.

At the warehouse, the police found a dirty mattress hidden in a small room at the back, but also a variety of twisted items, he’d… prepared. Rubber gloves, anesthesia, rope, and other things I wish they’d never told me about.

Even now, days later, I can’t stop thinking about that horrible afternoon. And I can’t help but wonder about one thing: what would have happened to our little girl if he hadn’t mixed up the names?

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Want to Kick That Nasty Little Habit?

Well, guess there’s a reason you’re here. We all have our bad habits, don’t we?

Did the title catch your attention? Are you trying to break free of this nasty little habit of yours?

Well, here are a few tips.

The first thing’s pretty obvious. I’m doing it right now. Believe it or not, but writing about it helps quite a bit. If only to keep your mind busy with something else, typing away for that matter.

Now let’s get serious here. The first thing you need to know is that the urge to keep at this habit will only persist for a few days, a week tops. After that, the nagging feeling drifts off, and you’re free, well almost. Try it!

Those first few days though, they can be tough, really though. There’s the shaking, the heart raising, the sweating and of course our good friend anxiety. You’ll constantly want to do it again, and at times you might even do. Been there, done that. Once you’ve made it through, things will get so much easier.

A little piece of advice though, even after weeks, if not month or years, you can have a relapse. There’ll be this nasty little voice in your mind, scratching at your consciousness.

“What would it feel like now?”

“Just once isn’t so bad?”

“It won’t happen again.”

It’s mostly a psychological issue.

Another thing might happen though. You might recall the good, old times. That night when you were outside, going for a walk to indulge in your habit. Or that night you spent with a certain someone and you wanted to make it a little bit more interesting. Oh even as I write this, I can hear the voice in my head, urging me to go back and to relive those feelings. If you’re in the same boat, be strong and surprise it. It’s not worth it. After all, the past is the past. The nagging little voice is only out to trick you.

As we all know though, it’s not all a psychological issue. At least those of you who are going through the same thing as I do will know.

There’s this nasty odor on your clothes that you can’t seem to get rid of. The smell on your hands and of course the taste in your mouth. You can do whatever you want, those things will stay and linger for quite a bit. You can wash your hands over and over again, yet the smell is still there.

You might also notice that your eyes are eyes are a tad bit wider than usual. There could be a popped blood vessel or two. Try it, go look at the mirror, I’m sure they’re there. It’s normal when you try to kick a tough habit.

Now if you notice these things, others will too, of course. They might ask you why you’re so nervous or jittery. And of course, our friend anxiety is there as well, right at our doorstep. Loud noises, someone tapping your shoulder, someone screaming nearby, all those things can be a little too much during this first week. It’s best to tell the people around you about your little predicament.

Otherwise, those influences could send you straight back to your little habit. Just once, to calm down a little. You have to be strong. I’m sure you can do it.

The most important thing though is your mindset. You need to understand that you have to do it for yourself. You can’t do it for friends, your family or even your lover. That’s not how it works.

Never, I repeat, never make it about others or how you can make things better for them. That’s the easiest way to get right back to it once you’re alone. I can’t count how often I made the same mistake.

You need to realize, first and foremost, that this habit is bad for you. That’s the only way out.

You know, I’ve been preaching to you for so long, yet here I am. It hasn’t even been an hour since I fell right back to my little habit. Oh I know it’s terrible. I know I really have to stop it.

As I’m typing these words, I can still smell the blood. I can still taste it. I’ve washed my hands countless times, yet the smell persists, there’s nothing I can do. I know I have to wash my cloth, but I know that they’re most likely ruined. Blood really has such a strong odor, and at times it just won’t come off.

Well, who the hell am I lying too? At times the urge is just too strong. On certain days, I can’t help but go out into the night and kill again.

So, if you guys have a few other tricks or tips, feel free to put them in the comments down below. I’m sure to check them out later.

I’ll be back in a few. For now, though, I really need to get rid of this body.

Fertilizer

The moment I had signed the sales contract for the old farmhouse I’d been happier than I was in years.

You see, in life, I did everything right. I headed the advice of my teachers and parents. After I’d finished school, I went on to university and got my degree in business. I graduated with honors and started working at a fancy company. After a decade and a half, I’d climbed high enough on the corporate ladder to be head of the sale department. It meant quite the salary, but also more responsibility and more hours on the job.

During these years I moved into a newer, fancier place every couple of years, bought more luxuries, but spent less and less time home enjoying it all.

With each passing year, I grew to hate my life a bit more. I hated my job, my apartment and even the overcrowded city I lived in. I was yearning for a break and for some quiet and solitude.

When my uncle Dennis died, I was surprised to be named the sole benefactor. Apparently, he had no other relatives but me. Selling most of his property I left me with a substantial sum. With the savings I already had, I decided it was time for a change.

I had long dabbled with the idea of moving to a rural area. Growing my own vegetables, get a few chickens and live a self-sustaining lifestyle far away from the big city sounded nice.

It had always been something I was interested in, a sort of fantasy. Reality was different. There were always deadlines to make, projects to finish and contracts to discuss and sing. Time moved along, and year after year I did nothing.

Now though, enough was enough. I didn’t want to end up like the people who’d finally made it to retirement only to realize that they were now too old and feeble to follow their dreams.

When I quit my job, my boss was surprised and flabbergasted. Of course, I still had my termination period of four weeks, but most of that time was spent to make adjustments.

While my boss was busy finding a replacement for me, I started to look around for a promising property. After a week of searching, I found it. It was an old farmhouse with quite a few plots around. It was located in a small village near a mountainous area. Until two years ago it had been owned by a woman, but after she’d died her son had put it up for sale.

When I visited the place, I saw that it was old and not just a bit run down, but I was sure all this could be fixed.

My last day of work arrived quickly.

It was a few weeks later that I finally signed the sales contract and started to move what few belongings I wanted to keep to the old farmhouse. Once I’d put together some sort of temporary living quarters, I decided it was time to move in.

I tried my hands at remodeling the old house myself, but I was soon reminded that I never had any talent using my hands. In the end, I gave up in frustration and contracted a company for it.

It took another couple of weeks, but once they were done the place looked nice, cozy and modern.

After the repairs on the chicken crop were finished, I bought half a dozen chickens and a roaster.

Being woken up by him in the morning reminded me of those childhood days I spent at my grandparent’s farm. The nostalgia flooded over me in pleasant waves as I drank my morning coffee.

By now I decided it was time to visit what few neighbors I had. To the north of me, quite a bit away lived an older lady and next to her a middle-aged couple whose kids went to middle school. After my initial introductions, I didn’t have much to do with them.

To the south lived an older couple, the Richters. They lived in a huge old farmhouse. They used to be farmers themselves when they were younger but had since retired. They were nice and assured me they’d help me out if I ever had any problems.

After that, there was only one person left, the old man living to the farm east of me. It was an old farmer who I guessed was in his late fifties or early sixties. He owned the fields adjacent mine. Only a small dirt road divided our properties. I’d seen him from afar a few times, but whenever I’d greeted him, he’d ignore me. His face was hard as if carved from stone, his lips were always pressed together, and he had a perpetually angry expression.

The moment I walked over towards his farm, he tried his best to ignore me yet again. When he saw that I walked towards him, he turned to me. His face showed that he’d rather do anything else, but talk to me.

“Hello, I’m Daniel Langscheidt, I bought the-“

“Know damn well who you are. You’re the guy who bought Lisbeth’s old house and made it all fancy and what not.”

“Eh, yeah, nice to meet you.”

With that, I held out my hand for a greeting. He didn’t budge or even look at the hand I was awkwardly holding out in the empty air between us.

“Why’d you move here?”

“Oh, I was going to try my luck at farming. I always wanted to grow my own,” I broke up as the old man burst into laughter.

“You? Farming? Your hands are as soft as a girl’s! This land is tough! I tell you right away that you won’t grow a damned thing here. We don’t need to city folks like out here! Pah!”

With that, he spat on the ground in front of me and without another word made his way towards his shack.

For a while I stood there, looking after the old guy. I was nothing short of surprised and dumbfounded. Why’d he thrown so much hate at me? What the hell was his problem?

More than a bit mad I want back home. What had I done to get this type of reaction? In the end, I told myself that he was most likely a miserable old fool, who hated himself and people in general. Not my problem.

From that point onward I tried my best to get the farm going. My knowledge was limited though, minimal. The internet with its endless information is fantastic, but it was all second-hand knowledge. I soon realized that if I ever wanted to learn how to do anything, I’d to get my own hands dirty.

I started with the old ladies small garden and planted a variety of different vegetables. The month after that I got the old greenhouse running again.

I soon had to learn that real life was no Harvest Moon. Running a farm and growing vegetable was tough. Needless to say, things didn’t grow well at all.

It was at a later meeting with Hans Richter and his wife that I learned that the ground here wasn’t the best anymore. They didn’t know what it was, but almost everyone had trouble getting things to grow here. You’d need a lot of care and fertilizer if you wanted to succeed.

A decade ago a few small time farmers were still living here. As things got harder, most of them abandoned the trade. Some turned to raise livestock, others changed to different professions.

There was only one, single person whose fields were still flourishing, Old Werner’s.

It turned out that Old Werner was no other than my next door neighbor. When I told the Richters how my introduction with him went, they both started to laugh. Werner was a bitter old man. He didn’t like people and had lived alone most of his life. He was a very solitary man. When I asked if something happened to him, they both said no. It was just how he was. I’d be best for me to ignore him. That’s what everyone else did anyway.

As I’d said, I took things slow, worked the garden, studied different types of seeds, how to take care of crops and many other topics. It was early summer by then, so much too late to actually sow anything on the fields. So I let them lay fallow for the year.

As summer moved along though I was surprised to see how the old man’s fields were bursting with rip grain and vegetables. Sure, they told me the old man was doing alright, but what I saw was more than that. No, he seemed to be doing pretty damn well. I could barely get a couple of tomato plants to bear fruit in the greenhouse, yet he had fields of them!

Harvest came and went. I was frustrated at my own inability to grown anything but also impressed at how well he was doing. I didn’t like it one bit.

As summer turned to autumn, there was one thing I found a bit strange. I often caught the old guy driving out in the middle of the night and returning back home a few hours later.

I’d noticed it by accident when I was out one night. I’d decided to take a walk in the mild autumn air and to gaze at the stars. I was on my way to the local viewing platform when a car approached me from behind. Its headlights were off, and it sped past me, yet I was sure I’d seen old Werner.

I didn’t think anything of it, yet I wondered why he drove around without his headlights on. My first thought was that he forgot them or hell, he might just be an asshole who liked to scare people.

In time I learned that the old man was making these ominous trips frequently. Always in the middle of the night and still without his headlights on. There was no other explanation, he was trying not to get noticed.

Well, to be honest, it was none of my business, and I told myself to ignore him and his weird antics. Yet, I couldn’t help but find it unnerving. I started to wonder what reason he had for this strange nightly trips. I didn’t help that he kept it up all autumn and continued well into early winter. It was a sheer mystery to me.

Once the new year began and spring came around I started to do the same as all other farmers: I started working my fields. I got quite a few stares and scoffs from old Werner. Many snide remarks were directed at me, or I’d see him laugh his ass off when things didn’t work out for me. To tell you the truth, I tried my very best to stay above this petite behavior. Every once in a while though I couldn’t help but yell back something similar.

I’d had a few very long talks with Hans Richter, and he’d been paying me the occasional visit. He helped me to get things going, advised me on when to sew what, what fertilizer to use and so many other important things. I have no clue what I’d have done without him. He was a godsend.

Still, it didn’t matter all too much. Things just didn’t grow. Each day I walked the fields looking at rows upon rows of barren earth. Only here and there a few lonely plants were growing. Old Werner’s fields, on the other hand, were thriving, and of course, the old man wasn’t shy rubbing it in.

“You city folks just don’t have it in you, that’s what it is,” he’d shout over at me and start laughing.

At other times he was a condescending asshole, pitying me. “That’s as far as you’ll get. If I were you, I’d give up while I still could. No reason to keep trying.”

I hated that damned old man.

One day, after I’d watered the few lonely plants that were growing, he came over to pull another one of his nasty jokes.

“Shouldn’t water them too much, don’t want these few plants you accidentally got to grow to go to waste, do you?”

“How the hell do you do it?” I asked instead of reacting to his remark.

He just stared at me.

“How come your crops are growing so well when no one else can do it? And don’t give me this city folk bullshit, everyone else tells me they’ve got trouble as well.”

The old man’s face started to distort into a knowing grin, yet he said nothing.

At that moment I remembered how often I’d seen him walk the fields with these unnamed bags of fertilizer.

“Is it that fertilizer of yours?”

“Heh, not as dumb as you look,” he answered.

“So what sort of fertilizer is it? Do you make it yourself? What do you put into it?”

The old man burst out laughing.

“You think I’m going to tell you a damn thing about it? Oh, I don’t think so!” he said spitting on the ground. “This is my very own, special formulae. You’ve no idea what I’m going through to make it, to perfect it! Before I’d tell anyone, especially you, I’d rather have the devil take me away!”

Without another word, he turned around and stormed back to his farm.

As the weeks went on, most of my fields should stay barren. The old man’s were covered in lush green like they’d been the year before. What the hell was in that fertilizer of his, I wondered.

It was sometime later when I visited the Richters that I saw the local newspaper on the kitchen table. I halfheartedly opened it, and an article caught my eye.

“Middle-aged woman still missing since last autumn.”

The article was about a woman, a mother of two, who’d gone missing on a hiking trip in the nearby area, last year. When I started reading, Susan, Hans’ wife came over.

“Such a sad story… I wonder why it keeps happening.”

“Hold on, what do you mean?”

“Oh, it’s those hiking paths near the mountains. Each year people vanish there. The authorities say its slippery slopes and people aren’t careful enough. Why they don’t close it off?!”

“It really is something,” her husband said,” they always warn hikers and climbers, but people won’t listen. A mother of two, what was she even thinking?”

I listened to them and learned that more than a dozen people had gone missing near the mountain range. Last year it hadn’t only been the woman, but an older man as well. They said it was almost inevitable that people went missing there. Of course, people talked to the local council, but they didn’t listen. The normal hiking paths and climbing locations were safe and secure, and there were enough warnings about straying from them.

As I listened to them, there was something in the back of my mind. Something I couldn’t quite grasp.

Only when I returned home and saw Old Werner, stalking around his fields, did I remember what it was. The woman had gone missing in autumn. Wasn’t that the time when he went on all those trips?

I realized what my brain was trying to put together. The more I thought about it, the more everything did fit together. He drove out in the middle of the night, headlights off, to an unknown location. And there was this special fertilizer of his.

For a moment I couldn’t help but imagine Old Werner out on the hiking paths at night searching for lonely wanderers to turn them into fertilizer.

What was I thinking? I almost burst out laughing at my own ridiculous idea. This was not a movie, this was real life!

Somehow though I couldn’t completely get rid of the idea. I don’t know why I did it, but I started to spy on the old man. It might have been my frustration. It might have been boredom. It might have been the resentment I felt towards him. I’ not sure.

It was not that I believed in my idea. It was way too far-fetched. I told myself that all I wanted was to figure out how he grew his crops and what sort of fertilizer he used. I knew I was only lying to myself though. Now, I thought there was more about this old fool, his strange behavior and that fertilizer of his.

The more I thought about it, the more I was able to convince myself.

Whenever I saw him out in the fields, applying his fertilizer, my thoughts went back to the same topic. I told myself to stop and leave it alone, but I couldn’t. It wasn’t long before my curiosity turned into an obsession and I started to take tabs on him. I took notes on how often he went out, when he got up in the morning, how long he stayed up in the evening and many other things. It wasn’t like I had much else to do anyway. Most of my fields resembled a barren wasteland anyways.

After a couple of weeks, I had his whole routine written down. I knew pretty much everything that went on at his farm.

So I was more than a bit surprised when I saw him drive out with his car in the middle of the night on Saturday. He hadn’t done that in the past five weeks. It was by sheer coincidence that I’d even noticed it. It was already early morning when he returned.

I saw him get out of his car, but instead of going back inside, he went to the back of the car and opened the trunk. I the dark of the night, hunched behind my window, I pressed my binoculars against my head so hard, it hurt. My whole body tensed up, and I didn’t dare move or breath. In horror, I watched how Old Werner dragged something out of the trunk. It was long, big, and covered in a thick blanket. I watched as he heaved it over his shoulder.

As he took a first step towards his hack, I saw something long and thin dangle from the pack.

Oh, Jesus Christ, I thought. Don’t tell me… Was that what I thought it was? Had I really seen it? No, I must be wrong. I was seeing things. Maybe I’d imagined it. But what I’d seen dangling… It couldn’t be. I thought back to the woman in the newspaper article. Was this another one? Another victim? Another ingredient for his fertilizer?

I had to go there and find out more. I should take a look at the shack. The moment I saw how Old Werner returned from his shack, all thoughts about going there left my mind.

It was dark, but in the moonlight, I could clearly see that his hands and lower arms were covered in something. I saw his dark, angry expression as he made his way back to his house. My whole body was filled with fear. For the first time in my entire life I was honestly and utterly terrified.

I couldn’t help the urge to hide as soon as he’d walked back to his house. I knew there was no reason for it. The old guy couldn’t possibly see me. I had the lights off, and I was way too far away from him to notice anything at the windows.

Once he’d vanished inside, I started to calm down, at least a bit. My mind was still a crazed whirlwind of contradicting ideas. One part of it said I was stupid and nothing was going on. The other part told me that Old Werner was a crazed serial killer. Even in bed I couldn’t calm down and took me a long time till I actually fell asleep.

When the rooster awoke me in the morning, I was thankful that the few hours of sleep I’d had were undisturbed and free from dreams about bloodied old men.

While I was drinking my morning coffee, I watched his house as I’d done every morning for the past weeks. As if nothing had happened last night, the old man went out to take care of his fields.

Had this guy really murdered someone last night and dragged the body into his shack? As I sat there, I was almost shaking with curiosity. I had to find out, I had to.

I knew that every week, on Sunday evening, he spent an hour or two at his shack. During that time he most likely mixed up his fertilizer. Once he was done, he went back to his house and most likely straight to bed. This might be the best chance to see what he’s up to in there.

The whole day I was antsy and couldn’t sit still. I made plans what I’d do, how I’d approach and how I’d find a bloodied body lying on the floor of the shack.

When the day finally turned to night, I turned off the lights in my house to give him the impression I went to bed early. He’d believe it, I was sure. Us city folks don’t work as hard as he did, was what he most likely thought in his arrogance. All the while I sat at my window watching him with my binoculars.

My cue was when the lights of the shack turned off, and the old man went back into his house.

I dressed in all but black, and after waiting for another half an hour, I made my way outside.

With low and quiet steps I made my way over to his place. For the first time, I wasn’t mad at how well his corn had grown. It allowed me to get near his house without having to hide much.

Once I was closer, I checked out his farm from between the corn. The lights were off. There were no sounds, and nothing was moving. It was clear that the old man must have gone to bed. To be on the save side, I still waited for another ten minutes.

When they’d passed, I rushed to his shack. My heart was beating heavily when I’d made it, and everything stayed quiet.

I wasn’t too surprised to find the door locked by a padlock. Even I knew that there was no way that I’d be able to open it. I hadn’t imagined that I’d be lucky enough to find the door unlocked anyways.

No, I went for the window of the shack that I was able to see from my house. I knew it would be locked too, but it was one of these old wooden windows. It consisted of two shutters and was only held shut by a metal bolt in the center. I might be able to pry it open wide enough to loosen the bolt and open it.

I pried away the two shutters from one another until I could fit my finger in-between. At that point, I knew where the shutter was. I’d to be careful. If I broke the window, the old man would hear me without a doubt. After a nerve-wracking minute of toying around with a couple of tools, I finally loosened the bolt, and the window opened.

I scanned the window frame and the area below. Once I saw that there was nothing I could topple over, I climbed inside.

The shack was larger than I imagined. For now, all I saw were shelves filled with tools and various other things. Step by step I made my way through the place, scanning it. In the end, I took out a small flashlight I’d brought, to give things a closer look.

There was a sort of mixing station at the end of the shack. To be honest, it was nothing but an old workbench, but on it was an assortment of things. There were containers of various chemicals and fertilizers, a sack of bone meal and a few bags of his complete fertilizer mixture.

As I looked on, I noticed something next to the workbench. It was a sort of metal composter as well as a freezer united cramped into the corner next to it. The composter was quite modern. It was most likely one of those that helped to quickly compost organic material. I’d read about them.

My skin started to crawl as I stared at it. I took a deep breath, and after toying with it for a bit, I figured how to open it. The instant it opened I almost vomited. The smell alone was enough to make me retch.

When I looked inside, I saw bloody guts and a few pieces of half-rotten meat.

“Fucking hell,” I cursed and stumbled back in shock and disgust. I crashed straight into the assortment of containers on the workbench. A number of them clattered to the ground in an ear-shattering noise.

My eyes grew wide. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You goddamn idiot, what the hell did you just do!? I turned off the flashlight and waited. Oh god please, I hoped. Please make him stay asleep.

I waited for almost half a minute, praying that Old Werner would stay asleep. My prayers weren’t answered. My heart almost stopped when I heard the front door of his house open.

“Goddamnit, what’s going on out there? If it’s you damned kids again…”

He said nothing else. Oh shit, did he see the window? I tried to think, tried to remember if I’d closed it after me, but I couldn’t. For all I knew, the two window shutters might still be wide open.

“Is someone there?” I heard his voice. Then his footsteps came closer.

“I dare you, whoever the devil you are, show yourself!”

I didn’t move. I hoped against all certainty that he’d go back to his house, but only a moment later I heard him from the side of the shack.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!”

He must’ve seen the open window. I could already hear him rummage with the padlock!

Now or never I thought. There was no way I could explain this to him. I was back at the window, tried to get up, but before I could do any more than to put my foot on the window frame the door opened. In one swift motion, he hit the light switch and saw me standing there, dressed in all black, trying to flee the scene.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY SHACK!?”

Then the smell hit him and his anger turned to pure rage.

“YOU. YOU. YOU GODDAMN…” but in his rage he couldn’t even finish his sentence anymore. In his blind rage he picked the first tool he could, a rake, and came swinging after me. There was no way I’d make it out in time. I barely ducked away and fled to the back of the shack.

“No, don’t! I swear I saw nothing! I only,” but I didn’t get the chance to finish as I had to dodge another hit of the rake.

Finally, he saw the open composter and the disturbance on the workbench.

“You just had to know, did you? You couldn’t let it be. Do you have any idea what I went through to finish this? One decade, one whole decade… and now you’re trying to steal it?!”

What the hell? Had he just admitted to what I thought he had?”

“That’s it! You’re the last person to EVER barge in here, I swear it!”

And with that, he threw the rack to the ground and came at me himself. He almost jumped me and only now did I realize that Old Werner might have been an old man, but damn was he strong. A life of farming had made his body stout and hardened his muscles. All I was able to do was to struggle against him and keep him from overpowering me. I clung to sheer desperation, as I was pushed back against the workbench.

His eyes were wide open, and a moment later he raised one of his hands and hit me square in the face, once, twice. When I stumbled, he closed his hands around my neck.

I couldn’t breathe. Only at this moment did I realize that he was really going to kill me. I was going to die. Stars appeared in front of my eyes, but there was nothing I could do. I twitched in his iron-hard grip, grasped blindly around for something, anything. My hands closed around something hard and cold. With all the power I could muster I swung it into the direction of Old Werner. There was a nasty sound, and the old man screamed up.

Only when I swung it a second time did I see what I was already holding. It was an old mallet. For a moment I saw the surprise in his eyes, and his grip loosened, only to close once more even harder. In his fury, he wasn’t just trying to strangle me anymore, no he was going to break my neck by sheer force. Again and again, I hit him with the mallet. After three more hits, his grip finally loosened and he slumped down and fell to the ground.

As I looked down at his head, I saw a nasty inward bump at the top where I’d hit him. What I was most surprised though was all the blood that still kept gushing forward.

Time stood still. As if in a trance I watched the blood flow from his unmoving body. It must have been only seconds before I realized what I’d done, but to me, it felt like an eternity.

The bloody mallet clattered to the floor, and I pushed old Werner’s body away from me.

I started shaking, almost screamed up. I’d killed him. I’d murdered someone.

I had done the right thing though, hadn’t I? He’d have killed me. He killed others! The guts, the meat, the freezer! There was no doubt! And I’d done it in self-defense!

When I opened the freezer, my world crumbled apart. What I found inside wasn’t a corpse. Neither was it body parts. It was a dead animal. In the freezer were the remains of a deer. Part of its lower half was missing, and his innards were carved out. The blood and the guts I’d seen!

What about the arm I’d seen last night though? It must have been… but then I saw the legs of the deer. What I’d seen had been a long, thin, body part. Only the dark of the night and my imagination had transferred it into the arm of a person.

Dear god, what had I done? Had this old guy really done nothing more than to create some sort of complicated organic fertilizer?

Right at this moment, my instincts activated and I turned to run. I’d already made it to the door of the shack when my mind started to work again. What the hell was I doing!?

Should I call the police? What would I tell them? That I broke into his place because I thought he was a serial killer? That he attacked me after that and I killed him in self-defense? Would they even believe me? In that outfit?

No, it was much more likely that they thought I’d broke into his shack, he found me stealing his stuff, and I killed him. Or hell, that I came in here and killed him. I’d made it no secret that I hated him.

Shit. Shit. Shit. What the fuck should I do?

First I turned off the light in the shack. Was there anyone nearby? There’d been so much noise! As I watched and listened, I remembered that no one else lived near enough to have heard anything. The only person who’d heard anything would’ve been no other than me.

I went back inside, closed the door of the shack and then the window. I checked the wood splintering on the window and tried my best to get rid of it and make it sound as natural as possible.

After that, I put everything back that the old guy had pushed off the shelves in his onslaught.

Finally, there was the old guy himself. Was he really dead? I awkwardly touched his neck to see if there was any pulse. Then I looked at his head again and wondered what the hell I was even doing.

For a while, I wondered what to do, but then I saw his huge fertilizer bags. Old Werner might have been strong, but he was still a scrawny old man. The irony was not missed on me when the old man’s body was almost a perfect fit for it.

I pushed the body bag to the front of the shack and then started to meticulously clean up the blood. First I wiped up the floor and the workbench. Then I checked every notch and cranny and used one of his many chemicals to get rid of any blood spatters. I checked the whole place multiple times over. I had to make sure there were no blood splatters left anywhere. Only then did I open the door again.

Once again I checked the area. Sure, it was dark and not even thirty meters to the cornfield. Yet, I knew if anyone should see me carrying a bag of fertilizer through his yard the night before he went missing… I couldn’t risk it.

When I was sure that I was completely alone, I sprint to the edge of the cornfield with the heavy bag over my shoulder. Once I’d made it, I stumbled forward for a few more meters, but luckily avoided to crash to the ground.

For a moment my head was spinning, and I almost passed out from the sheer exhaustion.

I rested the bag between the cornstalks and ran back to the shack. The whole place smelled of the chemicals I’d used. Once more I went through it, using water to clear away the residue of the chemicals.

I also closed off the composter and the freezing box. Before I did that though, I got part of the animal meat, cut it to pieces and ground it up with the mallet.

I added the ground up meat to the composter. I made sure to leave the bloodied and dirtied tool on the workbench. I had to make it look as if it was the last thing the old guy had done.

At this moment I noticed something else. A notebook was stashed away in a small shelve above the workbench. When I opened it, I found that it contained the old guy’s notes on how to create his special type of fertilizer. It was pages upon pages of ingredients with detailed instructions.

I skimmed one of the pages, and it specified how certain ingredients had to be gathered. On the next one, he clarified that deer meat was best during their mating season, in autumn or early winter.

That must’ve been the reason for his secret trips. He was getting deer meat for his fertilizer. All he’d been doing was trying to keep his formula a secret.

Once I was outside again, I closed the padlock, careful not to leave any fingerprints on it.

Carrying Old Werner’s body over to my house took quite a while. Every ten meters or so I had to take a break. Once I’d made it, I hid the body down in my basement.

After that I went back to the cornfield, to make sure there were no tracks or blood splatters anywhere.

It was an hour or so before dawn when I was finally done with everything. I was utterly exhausted and pretty much fell into my bed.

The next day was a blurry mess for me. I spent most of it in bed, curled up under my blanket. Murder is not something from which you move on with your life. You just can’t.

It was only in the evening that I remembered his little notebook. Reading through his notes was the only thing helped me to turn my thoughts away from what I’d done. It’s not an understatement that the topic of fertilizer saved my sanity that day.

I carefully went over every page. I knew damned well that I’d not be able to turn my harvest around. I might try my luck in the greenhouse though, and if that would be a success, I could prepare for next year.

During the next days, I procured quite a few things: a composter different fertilizers, chemicals, bone mean and a variety of other ingredients.

One thing I was missing though and that I wasn’t sure how to get was deer meat, but I knew I had a substitute for it in my basement. It was still quite fresh, and most importantly, I had to get rid of it.

It was a nasty piece of work as you can imagine. I almost vomited every couple of minutes. Due to the heat, Old Werner’s body had been rapidly decomposing. I almost vomited the moment I saw his bloated, squishy corpse.

Eventually, though I got used to it. I grew numb, or I was already. There is one thing though, I told myself over and over again. This was not a person. This was a hunk of meat, nothing more. Once I cut it up though, it became pieces. The blood, the flesh, the bones, it all became things. And that way it got easier. I didn’t mind anymore. Grinding Old Werner up had become nothing but work in the end. Gruesome work, sure, but still only work.

It took me the better part of two days, but after that, I’d ground up the old guy’s remains. Finally, I added them to the other ingredients in the composter.

It was about a week or so later that the police arrived at my doorstep. I’d never seen an officer like that. Old, tired, and most of all, utterly disinterested in what was going on. He asked me a few questions. The typical ‘when have you last seen him’ and other similar ones. I answered them truthfully, and the guy said he’d be back if he needed more information.

He checked the old guy’s property, the shack, the house. The only thing he noticed was that Old Werner must have gone out in the middle of the night.

It was clear that this officer didn’t give a shit. He didn’t care what happened here in this small village. He concluded that Old Werner must’ve walked off and vanished in the middle of the night. They put together a search party, but it was only a few people, and they never found out a thing. Old Werner became just another name added to the list.

After this, his house was put up for sale, but no one seemed to show any interest.

It’s now late in the year, and the fertilizer I’ve created has developed nicely.

Six weeks ago, I upgraded the greenhouse for winter farming. Since then things have grown well, really well. The tomatoes are big, ripe and almost bursting with flavor. The old man had indeed created a splendid recipe.

What’s more interesting though, is that I can’t help but notice how fast and strong the plants have grown. They look even healthier than Old Werner’s. It might be the unique conditions in the greenhouse. To be honest, though, it might be due to my own little addition to the fertilizer.

As I’m typing this out, I can’t help but laugh at the grim irony of the situation. The one way the old man was able to improve his fertilizer even further was by becoming part of it himself.

She was Perfect…

The first time I saw her was two months ago, while she was grocery shopping.

She was not your typical pretty girl. You couldn’t really call her charming nor attractive. No, instead she was a bit mousy, a bit shaggy and scrawny. To me, that was perfect, exactly what I was looking for.

Her whole demeanor spoke volumes. She was a loner, an outcast, just like me. She dodged other people at the store, kept her eyes low, and her voice broke whenever she had to talk to someone.

It was only natural that I followed her.

We were on the bus only for a couple of minutes. She didn’t even notice I was there. It was just a couple dozen meters before we reached her home. It was a small house, a bit old, a bit rundown. How very fitting, I thought and laughed a bit.

Finding out her name wasn’t too hard and once I had that, I had a field day on the internet. Of course she had a Facebook profile, and of course, it was connected to Instagram. Both profiles were almost entirely empty. There were only a handful post and a couple of friends. Guess she wasn’t the social type.

Where I struck real gold was her LinkedIn profile. She was a web developer, working remotely, most likely from her own home. Just my luck, this whole thing was getting better and better.

Whenever work allowed it, I was near her house or stalking her on one the few trips she made. I did so for weeks.

I wanted as much information on her as possible. I had to find out when she got up, when she went to bed when she went out grocery shopping and anything else.

After a while, I’d gotten a steady grip on her daily routine. She wasn’t an early bird. I often noticed the first movement at her window around the ten-hour mark. At night lights stayed on till two, sometimes three in the morning. She went grocery shopping every late Wednesday afternoon and went to get her mail on Saturday morning.

There wasn’t much else to her life. No one ever came visiting her. There were no friends, no lovers, and no relatives. Hell, she didn’t even interact with any of her neighbors.

It was a week or so ago that something changed. By then I’d prepared everything. Friday was supposed to be the big day. I’d even taken the week off work to solely focus on her.

It was on Wednesday when I noticed a change in her routine. I was nearby, hidden, waiting for her to get ready for grocery shopping, as she did every week.

Nothing happened though. No doors opened, no one left, nothing, but solitude.

After half an hour I grew antsy, after a full one I was restless. Was she having a day off? But that didn’t fit her at all, she was so meticulous about time and routine.

I waited, but as the minutes passed on and on, I couldn’t see a hint of activity at the house. I started to get worried. What if something happened? For a moment I wondered if she’d somehow snuck out, but there was no way I’d miss her.

No, something must have happened. Maybe she was sick? What if it was something worse though? By god, what if she fell down the stairs or even worse, did something to herself? For all I knew, she could very well be the depressed type and… No, don’t think about this. Shit, I cursed, almost screamed up. That couldn’t be happing.

Finally, I decided there was no other way. I walked up to her door and rang the doorbell. I could pretend to be asking questions about home improvement or that I was doing a sort of survey. I put a story together in my head. As I rang the bell, I hoped that she’d open the door. To see this mousy, little face, the shaggy hair, and the scrawny body. Again though, nothing happened, and the door stayed close. Even after I’d rang the bell countless times.

I was all pins and needles as I walked off again. I had to go back I told myself, but I couldn’t just break down the front door. I thought about what I could do. All the while my mind started to be filled with horrible images, and I had to fight the urge to turn back.

I walked for a bit and then approached the small building from a different side. From here it wasn’t hard to get to the building without being noticed. There were enough trees and bushes nearby to hide me from view. Getting in would be even easier. The house was old, and she hadn’t invested in an alarm system or anything like that.

I was in within minutes.

The place was in pure and utter chaos. For a moment dread crept up inside of me. Had someone broken in? I rushed through the hallway, looking desperately for signs of a break-in. Soon enough though, I realized that this chaos wasn’t a recent thing. No, she seemed to be untidy. Well, that was an understatement, the place was a pigsty.

As I walked through the place, I found heaps of dirty laundry and trash bags. The kitchen counter was hidden under stacks of dirty dishes and empty take-out boxes. Her desk was a disgusting, sticky mess. The whole place had a sour, almost rancid smell to it. It was nothing short of disgusting.

There was one thing I couldn’t find in-between all this mess: her.

There was no hint in the kitchen or bedroom, neither in the living room nor in the bathroom.

I went through the whole place, checked the upstairs and even had a short look at the attic, nothing.

“Shit, where the hell are you, Maria?”

As if to answer my question, a low cry, or better a moan, sounded from somewhere. At first, I didn’t know where it came from, but then I found the basement door. It was cracked open a bit, and I could see a faint light coming from downstairs.

I made my way down the stairs one step at a time. My dear Maria must be down there, I thought smiling. Maybe she’d a bit of an accident and fell down the stairs? That moan though, she must still be alive. I felt the fire course through my veins as each step brought me closer to her. Beads of sweat appeared on my forehead due to the hot rush of anticipation. With each step the smile, no the grin on my face turned wider.

As long as she was still alive, all was well.

I was almost shaking with excitement when I made it down the stairs. Finally, I saw a figure at the bottom, a woman. Oh god, there she was! She was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall and the moment I could see her face I realized it wasn’t Maria.

“What the-” I started, but broke off when the woman’s eyes flashed open.

Her face looked exhausted, but when she saw me her eyes grew wide, and her face became one of desperation.

“Oh my god,” she whispered, “oh god, please, you have to help me.”

I could barely hear her, due to the low volume of her voice.

“Where’s Maria,” I asked her.

“My sister’s over there, in that room, she, she…”

She didn’t finish the sentence. I was alarmed instantly. I rushed over into the next room. The first thing I noticed was the greasy old bed, covered in wire. I didn’t get to even wonder about that, because then I saw Maria. She was on the floor, not moving, in a sea of her own blood.

It couldn’t be real. I told myself she was unconscious, that it wasn’t her blood, that she was still alive. The moment I saw her face and her dead eyes though, all those thoughts were evaporated. There was no doubt. She was dead.

And I was furious.

She’d been taken from me. My perfect Maria. Well, I thought, at least I’d thought she was perfect. I didn’t have a clue about this so-called sister. I didn’t know what was going on here and I didn’t care. All that mattered to me was that Maria was gone.

After a while, I got up and turned back to Maria’s sister.

“What did you do?” I asked.

“I, I-” she started but broke up again, shaking her head, breathing heavily.

“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?” I screamed at her.

“I got free,” she finally whispered. “My sister, Maria, she was crazy, I know, no one will believe me, but she was! She chained me to the bed over there to make sure I’d tell no one about what she’d done back-“

“I don’t care about any of that. What did YOU do to HER?”

“The knife, I stabbed her, but I didn’t want to kill her. I swear, I didn’t want to…”

I could see the tears welling up in her eyes. She was crying now.

Knife, she’d said. It took me a few moments, but I saw it still lying in the pool of blood that had formed around Maria. For one more moment, I looked at her face, than at the knife. A simple kitchen knife, crude and ugly. I started to get furious again. Almost picked up the knife to exact revenge, but I told myself to calm down.

Instead, I turned around and smiled at her. For a moment she didn’t react, but then she looked up and returned my weak smile.

“Please, the police, please,” she whispered.

I went forward still smiling. Only now did I see the scar tissue all over her body. I saw the long cuts on her ankles. Oh Maria, you too tried your best, didn’t you?

“Don’t worry, I am going to take good care of you.”

Her smile vanished the moment I started to use my hands. I didn’t use them to help her, not to treat her wounds, no I used them to hurt her. I couldn’t use the knife laying in the pool of blood, and I didn’t have any of my perfect little tools with me. All I had was my hands, but I used them with the delicacy and the fury of a well-trained hunter. A hunter who’d just lost his prey.

She couldn’t even scream anymore. She was so exhausted, her throat so roughed up, that all she brought out were quiet moans and squeaks. All the while I used my hands to carefully work my way up and down her body, slowly turning her inside out. I tried my hardest not to damage anything that would kill her too soon.

In the end, she lasted another half hour. Very impressive, I thought, even though I’d held back quite a bit. It must have been tough, having been chained up down here, being tortured by your own sister.

In the end, I almost couldn’t be mad at her anymore for killing my prey. No, I had to thank her.

After all, she was able to satiate my hunger, at least for a while.

The Note

A few days ago I found a note on my roommate’s door.

I frowned instantly when I saw it. By now I’d grown quite annoyed at Tom’s antics. Ever since he started dating Jessica, he’d started doing this. She was the one who gave him the idea, saying it was cute and romantic.

Needless to say, when Tom left notes for me, they were neither cute nor romantic. Half the time they were plain stupid. You can’t imagine how often I found one saying ‘If you read this you’re a dumbass’ or ‘Please throw me away’.

At other times he used them to actually inform me about things. Saying he’d be gone for a day or two, that we were out of toilet paper, or telling me that he’d be working overtime at his dad’s law company.

You never knew which it was though.

When I had a look at this one it said:

‘Meet me at the Lebowski’s at five.’

I was a bit puzzled by that. The Lebowski’s was a bar in town we used to hang out at quite a bit in the past. Why today though? Weren’t we going to Fred’s place to watch the damned soccer game? He’d been going on about it for the past week and begged me to tag along. Why’d he suddenly want to change plans?

In the end, I shrugged and went on my way to work. To be honest, it didn’t matter to me, I wasn’t exactly a soccer fan.

On the tram, I pulled out my phone to call him why he wanted to go to the bar. It went straight to voicemail. So much about those perks at his dad’s company he’d been telling me about. I dropped him a quick message on WhatsApp and put my phone away.

Work was slow that day. I spent most of it sitting in front of my computer, pretending to be busy, while secretly browsing Reddit.

To be honest, I was looking forward to hanging out at the bar. It had been ages. Ever since we’d graduated, we didn’t have much time to hang out and even less since he was with Jessica. It would be nice to chill and have a few beers together again.

The moment my shift ended I was out of the building. Ten minutes later I was at the bar. It was still a quarter before five, but I decided to chat up the barkeeper. The dude was pretty much an old friend.

“Hey there, how’s it going? Been a while, hasn’t it?”

He eyed me for a moment before he recognized me. His face grew dark in an instant.

“Is your friend coming, too?”

“You mean Tom? Yeah, he told me to meet him here at five, been a while since-“

“Okay, listen up, I got no problem with you. Get yourself a beer, take a seat, fine by me. Once your friend arrives, you two get the hell out of here, alright?”

I was dumbfounded.

“What did he do? I mean it’s been a while, but I am pretty damn sure he didn’t do anything.”

“Don’t care, he’s not getting in again. Not after what happened with the girl.”

“What girl? What the hell are you talking about, man?”

“Alright, listen, you want to know what’s up? Get yourself a beer, and I’ll tell you all about it.”

Well, I got myself a beer and let the man talk.

He told me Tom had been here a couple of months ago with some of his old fraternity friends.

Apparently, the guys got quite drunk and started hitting on a group of girls. At first, the barkeeper said, he shrugged it off. As the evening continued though, the guys got a bit too touchy, so he told them to knock it off and leave the girls alone.

The real trouble started when one of the girls went to the toilet. After a couple of minutes, he noticed that her friends wondered where she was. A quick look around revealed that Tom was gone as well. He frowned and making sure nothing was wrong, he went to check up on things.

What he found was Tom pushing the girl against the wall in the hallway. His hand was over her mouth, and her blouse was ripped open.

The barkeeper tackled Tom in an instant, at which the girl started to scream that he’d wanted to rape her. Of course, Tom said it was bullshit and she provoked him, but the barkeeper said he knew what he’d seen.

He told the guys then and there to get the hell out of his bar. He asked the girl if she wanted him to call the cops, but in the end, she shook her head. Wasn’t worth the trouble, she said.

As I listened to that story, I’d no idea what to say. It sounded like complete and utter bullshit. Tom wasn’t the type of guy who’d do shit like that. It must’ve been someone else.

“You sure it was him?”

“Without a doubt. You guys had been regulars for years, no way I’d mistake someone else for him. I’ll probably recognize his face the moment he steps in.”

I didn’t know what to reply, so instead, I decided to wait until Tom would arrive. Hopefully, he’d be able to clear this whole thing up, and we could move past it.

It soon turned five, then ten past and then a quarter past. Where the hell was Tom?

Finally, someone approached me, but it wasn’t Tom. It was some lanky dude who’d entered the bar a while ago.

“Sorry, are you Chris?”

I nodded and before I could even say a word the guy handed me a note.

“I’m supposed to give you that.”

“Wait what’s this now?”

The guy shrugged.

“Don’t know, some random chick told me a guy named Chris would be here today at five. Gave me some money, so why the hell not.”

I looked down at this new note. What was it with notes today, I cursed to myself.

As I scanned it, I saw that there were only two things on it. A tram station and a line telling me to find Anna Schuster.

I sat there, sipping from my beer and looking down at the thing. Was this another one of Tom’s stupid antics?

I looked up trying to find the guy who’d handed it to me, but he was gone already. Instead, I turned to the barkeeper.

“You know what this is all about?”

He gave me an annoyed look. “What do you think I am, twelve? Why the hell would I be passing notes around?”

Sigh, he was right, this was ridiculous.

I finished my beer, paid up and left the bar to make my way home. I couldn’t help but look at the note again. A girl had given it to him, he’d said. Who the hell was it? Had it been this ‘Anna Schuster’?

Nah, don’t think about it.

A minute later I searched for a route to the station on the note. I cursed at myself again, but I was curious what this was all about.

The worst part was that the station was on the other end of the city. It would take me almost half an hour to get there. Well, as they said, curiosity is a bitch.

When I arrived at the station, I found myself in the middle of nowhere. Other than me only one person, an old lady, had left the tram. It couldn’t be her, I concluded.

For a while, I sat around waiting to see if anyone else would arrive.

“Where the hell are you, Anna?” I wondered.

After I grew tired of waiting, I got up and had a look around. There was nothing at the station. No notes, no hint, nothing but advertisement and the timetable for trams.

I googled the name, but all I found were dozens if not hundreds of Facebook Profiles. Great, I thought.

This was getting more and more stupid. What was I supposed to be doing here? There was nothing here! Was this nothing but a silly prank?

I ripped out my phone to call Tom again. It still went straight to voicemail. I looked up at the departure board and saw that the next tram would arrive in about ten minutes.

I looked up and down the street. Nothing. On the other side was this huge, modern factory complex. There was no way I’d go there and search for someone. Other than that though, there was nothing, no other buildings nearby. All there was, was a bounding wall behind me, most likely closing off some private property.

Finally, I opened Maps to see if there really was nothing else around. I realized why there were no buildings on my side of the street. The bounding wall belonged to a cemetery.

Was I supposed to meet this girl at the cemetery or…

I found the gate soon enough and went in. This had to be some fucked up joke, I told myself. With an ominous feeling, I started to make my way around.

I hoped that soon Tom or maybe some of his fraternity friends would jump out from behind a gravestone to scare me.

It didn’t take me long to find something else though, Anna Schuster’s grave.

The date on the gravestone told me she’d died about half a year ago. The engraved text said that the lovely daughter was taken from her family much too early.

What the hell. What’s this all about? Why send me here?

Then I got an idea. I took out my phone and this time I searched not only for her name but also her age and the day she’d died.

At first, I saw nothing of interest until I stumbled upon a long post at a local forum. It talked about a controversial case related to the rape and murder of a young woman.

As I started reading my heart dropped. It described that Anna Schuster had been out with friends, but never made it home that evening.

She was found the next morning, dead and the victim of sexual assault.

The official story was, that no perpetrator was ever found and that the case remained open to this day. The real story though, the poster said, is that it was clear who the perpetrators were. There were witnesses, and there was evidence pointing to a group of young man. They’d been harassing the girl before at a bar.

It couldn’t be I thought, as I read on.

The poster said those things soon changed. Witnesses changed or retracted their testimony, and evidence vanished. It was a full-blown cover-up. The poster mentioned seven names in total. One is the supposed son of the head of the police, another the son of wealthy parents, yet another the nephew of a politician. The list went on. Tom’s name was sixth on the list, the son of a successful and influential local attorney.

I read on and found out that the case was dropped without ever making it to trials.

I felt cold as I read this, very cold. How the hell had I never heard about any of this, but the answer was right in front of me. They’d swept it under the carpet.

Was it true though? Could Tom and his friends really have done that? I had to confront him about this. This was way too serious. On my way back to the station I tried calling him once more. He still didn’t pick up.

Once I was on the tram, I opened up the forum thread again. As I scrolled down, I found pictures of Anna and her family. In one she was posing with her parents, and in another, she was posing with… her sister? At least that’s what the caption said Anna and Karoline Schuster.

This couldn’t be. This girl was the spitting image of Tom’s girlfriend. No, the longer I looked, there was no doubt that this WAS Jessica. My head started to spin. What the hell was going on?

I tried calling Jessica, but I couldn’t reach her either.

The rest of the tram ride I was all pins and needles. I had to get home. I had to figure out what was going on.

As I arrived home, I went straight to Tom’s door and started knocking, but there was no answer. Then I remembered the note. Why this damned note. Don’t tell me…

I called his dad on his office phone. Even though it was almost nine in the evening by now the man answered. Before I could even so much as ask him he ranted to me about his useless son who thought it was okay to not show up to work. I cut him off.

“Tom hasn’t been in today?”

“No, he hasn’t,” the man answered annoyed.

I hung up right away and went back to his room. When I tried the handle, it was locked, as I’d expected.

Shit, what do I do? I was way too confused. I walked back and force before I went to my room.

At that moment I saw another note that was put up on the door to my room. There was only one line on it:

‘The key is in the potted plant in the kitchen.’

I ripped it in an instant. I felt goosebumps on my arm as I stumbled into the kitchen.

In an instant, I found the key and rushed to Tom’s door. As soon as I opened it, the smell hit me. It was the strong, irony smell of blood. With shaking hands I hit the light-switch. I stumbled back in shock and disgust.

When the ambulance arrived, it was clear that Tom was long dead. He’d been gagged, bound to a chair and there were various long cuts on his arms and legs. It was evident that these and the resulting blood loss had been the cause of death.

When the paramedics said he’d died only a couple hours ago, I realized what this whole thing must have been about. If I’d made it home in time, Tom might have still been alive, and if he’d get me to notice him, he’d been saved. Instead, though, I was out trying to figure out what those notes were all about. Now I knew.

The police found something else in the room. It was an audio statement, in which Tom admitted that he and his friends were responsible for the death and rape of Anna Schuster.

The moment I heard this confession, I crumbled up Jessica’s, or better Karoline’s, note in my pocket and hid it.

I said nothing about the things I’d found out at the bar and the cemetery or Jessica’s true identity. No, I stayed quiet and said I had no idea about the whole thing.

Sense of Smell

People never talk about the importance of the sense of smell.

They talk about touch, about hearing and seeing.

People always talk about how meals taste, yet there are only five distinct flavors.

With smell though, there are more than ten thousand different scents to enjoy.

What would life be like without your sense of smell? Think about the smell of freshly cut grass, the first flowers in spring or the salty smell of the ocean waters.

Think of the other sex. How much more attractive can someone be due to the smell of an exotic perfume or a rich aftershave?

My sense of smell was always one of the most important aspects of my life. As a kid, I loved to explore the world by using nothing but my nose. I grew obsessed with it in my early years. Flowers, food, animals, even the weather, I could recognize it all by my nose.

My parents saw a reason for concern and took me to the doctors. It was discovered that I’d been born with a very sensitive nose. It was rare, but no reason for worry. This obsession of mine would go away as I’d grow older, the doctor said.

He was right. Scents should remain an essential part of my life, but they’d not dominate it as they did when I was a kid. As an adult, they’d become an enrichment, something to make life a tad bit more enjoyable. The rich scents of different types of coffee, exotic spices, and various teas always filled my apartment.

As you can imagine, scents also played a part in my dating preferences.

Now I always thought I wasn’t as shallow as to decide my partners by their smell, but that changed when I met Linda.

Her smell was different, unique you could say, almost innocent. She had this fresh, sweet smell of spring around her. Not a hint of perfume surrounded her, nor was there any need for it. She had this pure, natural smell around her.

It floored me. I had noticed her in one of my lectures and had to approach her afterward. We became quick friends, and after another month, we went on our first date.

Things went well, and we soon started dating. She was cute and smart in certain ways, yet naive and innocent in others. It was the perfect mixture, precisely what I’d been looking for.

What was also perfect, was Linda’s apartment. She wanted to be a botanist, specializing in flowers and blossoming plants. It was adorable. Her whole place was filled to the brim with potted plants. The air was always heavy, almost over-saturated, with their fresh and sweet scents.

This would block out every other smell. It didn’t matter what it was, the smell of burned food, of dirty cloth or even that of rotten flesh.

It was important because after a while Linda started to smell quite a bit. Her many blooming flowers though are easily able to cover up those foul odors. And with a nose like mine, it is easy enough to make sure that no one else will notice them either.

At times I wonder if my parents would be happy to know, that I am not obsessed with smell anymore. No, now I am always obsessed with its absence.

Cat Fights

I moved into my new apartment back in July. I was sick and tired of my small one-room apartment and was on the look-out for a new one.

It was by sheer accident that I stumbled upon a cheap three-room one online. The rent was only a couple hundred Euros, which was almost unbelievable.

It was only half an hour later that I called the landlord to ask for visitation.

When I arrived, it was clear in an instant why the place was so cheap. It was on the second floor of what must have once been an old warehouse.

The first thing I noticed, when the landlord led me to the entry door at the back of the building, were the cats.

There were at least two dozens of them all over the yard. I asked the landlord about them and if they were strays, but he told me they belonged to a neighbor living nearby.

He pointed at an older two-storied family house. The place must have once been nice, but now it looked dated. The front yard was completely overgrown, and it looked like it hadn’t been cared for in years.

Inside the building, the landlord led me through a long hallway until we reached a sturdy metal door. To be honest, I didn’t feel too great about this whole thing anymore. While he fondled with the keys, I was about to make up an excuse to get out of there.

The moment I saw the actual apartment I stopped. The place looked nothing short of amazing. It was huge, nicely renovated and as modern as could be.

I moved in about a week later.

It wasn’t long before the problems started.

At first, I didn’t mind the cats at all. Sure it was a bit creepy that they all eyed me suspiciously whenever I got outside, but that was about it. After a while, some of them even approached me and let me pet them.

I don’t have a problem with animals, it’s the opposite, I adore them. It’s just that these cats were quite the pests at night.

I don’t know what’s going on, but it seems that some of them were fighting during the night. Many times, loud screeching, hissing and growling noises woke me up at night.

It never lasted for a long time. Whenever I got up and made my way to the window to yell at them the fight and the noises were already over.

For the longest time, I tried to ignore it and shrug it off. I mean, it’s just cats, not like they were hurting anyone, right?

The problem was that it happened all the time. I have quite the stressful job, and it’s quite normal for me to work ten or twelve hours a day. If you can’t get a good night’s sleep before a tough day like this, you start to get angry, pissed even.

So a couple of weeks ago, I had enough and approached my neighbor about it.

He was a middle-aged man, late forties I’d say, living all by himself. I don’t know why he owned all those cats. Did he adopt all the strays in the area?

I’d never talked to him yet, but he’d greeted me a few times and seemed friendly enough. When I walked over to his front door, I told myself to stay calm and talk to him like a level-headed person.

I stepped past his many cats and rang the doorbell. It had barely stopped ringing when the man opened the door. He looked surprised when he saw me, almost a bit anxious.

“Hello there, mister…?”

“Schwartz,” I finished his sentence, “I am here because of your cats.”

His eyes grew wide for a moment.

“What do you mean? There’s been no one living here, so they-“

“They are too loud!” I pressed out in anger and told myself once more to calm down.

“What I mean is during the night. Their constant fighting is waking me up all the time. Isn’t there something you can do about it?”

“Oh, so that’s it. I am sorry for that I… well the cats are quite protective of the area. There are these other strays, you know, they are-“

“Okay, I get it, I really do, but I’ve got to get my sleep! Can’t you put them inside or something?”

“I can try, but they don’t like the indoors much, but I’ll see what I can do.”

“Great, I wouldn’t like to take it any further.”

For a quick moment, I saw how shock washed over his face before he nodded. I didn’t say anything else and left.

I felt like a bit of an asshole, but I couldn’t deal with this anymore. Now, of course, I wouldn’t go to the police because of a few cats, but sometimes a hint like this worked wonders.

I don’t know how the guy did it, but from that day onward, there was no more trouble. The cats were still outside, but somehow they weren’t fighting anymore.

After two weeks, I toyed with the idea of going over there and thanking him. I was a bit too early with that one.

One night, about a week ago, I was woken up again by the same noises outside. It was terribly loud as if one of the cats was fighting for dear life.

The moment I was at the window and opened it the noise was fading again. When I looked at the clock, I saw that it was barely two in the morning. I shut the window and went back to bed. I am a light sleeper though, and it took me almost an hour to fall back asleep.

I got an idea the next day. Sure, I could go and yell at the guy again, but what would it help? No, I’d thought of something else. That last night, the noise had come from almost precisely below my window. There were quite a few ways to scare off cats, I thought.

I got myself a bucket of water and put it right next to my window. If I’d hear these cats again, I’d make sure they’d regret it.

Two days later I got my chance. It was long past midnight when the noises started again. It was the weekend, so I was still up at that time. I rushed to the window, ripped it open and took up the bucket. The noise was fading as always, and I cursed to myself, but then I saw movement in the dark below.

In my pure anger, I picked up the bucket and sprayed its content in a long ark over everything below.

What I’d expected was to hear the frightened screams of cats as they rushed off into the night. Instead, I heard something different.

“What in the hell,” I heard my neighbor’s voice curse below me.

Then lower, in what was almost a whisper, he said, “No, don’t you dare!”

I was utterly dumbfounded and didn’t understand. Don’t tell me he was out there fighting the cats himself.

In a second I picked up my phone to illuminate the area below.

What I saw was indeed my neighbor. He wasn’t alone though. He was holding a little girl in his arms who was desperately struggling against his grip trying to get away. I saw that he had his hand over her mouth, but I could still hear the same low, muffled cat-like sounds.

The moment my neighbor realized that I was there, he sprinted back to his house holding the child in his arms. Only moments the two of them had vanished.

What the hell had just happened? I stood there, confused and befuddled.

Only minutes later my confusion was replaced by logic and concern. Who was this girl and what was he doing with her? She tried to get away from him, I remembered. Something was definitely not alright with this whole situation.

I called the cops and told them what I’d seen, and thought was going on.

They arrived soon after. From my window I could see my neighbor yelling at them and then pleading with them, trying to make excuses. The police didn’t have any of it and made their way inside.

It was a couple days later that I learned what had been going on there.

My neighbor hadn’t always lived in this building. Six years ago, he was a married man, living in a different part of the country.

His wife had died during the birth of their daughter due to complications. The man had vowed to take care of the child by himself. He sold most of his belongings and left the life he’d led with his wife behind and moved here, into this old, cheap home.

At first, he’d cared for the child in honest, he admitted in a police interview. Soon enough though, he started to despise her and blamed the child for the death of his wife.

Instead of taking care of the child, he kept her as one of the stray cats that turned up around his place.

That’s why the little girl had sounded like a cat. That’s all she ever knew and ever heard since the man said he’d refused to talk to her at all. She tried her best to mimic the sounds and speech of the only ones around her.

Once she got older though, he realized there was no way he could let her roam freely. Instead, he locked her away in the house’s basement.

As the years went by though, the little child figured out how to sneak away at night, to the frustration of her father.

Looking back I can’t help but blame myself. Each night I stood at my window cursing at what I thought was cat fights below. Instead, it must have been this little girl, trying to escape her father’s clutches.

Dumpster Man

There are many things which can reveal something about ourselves. The way we dress, our behavior, who we associate with and even how we furnish our apartment.

At times it’s the smallest things that reveal the most.

There is one thing though, no one ever thinks about that can reveal quite a bit about us: our trash.

Now, to be honest, I never thought about this myself. The one who came up with the idea was dumpster man.

Dumpster man lived in the same apartment building as me. It was this giant monstrosity that housed hundreds of people.

My apartment was located on the fourth floor. From there I could see the nearby park, the shopping mall down the road and of course the building’s walled in dumpster area.

It’s a common thing in my city. Each apartment building has its own private dumpsters that are walled in and can only be accessed via a key.

Dumpster man first appeared about two months ago. He was this scrawny, young dude with long, unkempt hair and roughed up clothes. The first time I saw him I instantly thought of Jay from the Kevin Smith movies.

He was, as you can probably guess, loitering around the dumpster area. I have no clue what drove him there, but whenever I took a peek outside, I could see him. At times he was sitting on the ground in front of it reading a book, at others, he was leaning against the wall smoking a cigarette.

At first, I thought he was a bum who decided to hang around the apartment building for some reason. I learned from a neighbor that he was actually living here as well. Apparently, he was some type of unemployed stoner dude, living on welfare.

Quite a few people scoffed at him when they threw their trash away or badmouthed him, but I wasn’t bothered by him at all. The dude was just sitting there reading and minding his own business. Hell, after the first week I started to greet him, and by the second we smoked the occasional cigarette together.

Turns out he used to be a student at the local university. He said things had gotten a bit too stressful, so he was taking a break from it. These days he was taking it slow, reading these old Jules Verne books and not doing much else.

He was quite the character, I thought.

As the days passed and I saw him down there, I couldn’t help to think that there was more to him. Why’d he sit next to the dumpsters all day? The weather was nice enough, and the park was only a couple minutes away. Why not go there? Why sit next to the smelly dumpsters?

The more I thought about it, the more I kept referring to him as dumpster man in my mind. I laughed at this stupid nickname, but I had to admit it was quite fitting.

It was a few days later, that I stood at my window, looking outside in the late afternoon. I was sipping from a cup of coffee when I heard an argument from below. And wouldn’t you know it, dumpster man was involved in it.

I didn’t understand what it was about, but there was this huge muscular dude, yelling at him and pushing him against the wall of the dumpster area. It looked as if dumpster man was in for a little beating. Suddenly though, the guy let him go, apologized, nodded and stormed off. I saw dumpster guy grin before he sat down again. What the hell had happened?

From that moment onward I couldn’t help myself but watch the events down there more often. I saw two other people who got into an argument with him, and I was sure it was only them.

What was the guy up to? Were people mad at him for loitering? If so, why had muscle dude apologized to him? There must be more to this.

It was my next door neighbor Miss Meier, who helped me solve dumpster man’s little mystery.

I was about to go grocery shopping when I ran into her in the hallway. She was usually a friendly middle-aged lady, but right now, she seemed to be furious. She almost bumped into me.

The moment she noticed me, she started venting about the creepy guy outside.

“Are you talking about dumpster ma-” I broke up and shook my head, “the guy at the dumpsters?”

“Who else would I be talking about? God, it’s so disgusting!”

“Wait, what is? He is just-”

“The stuff he’s doing! Going through people’s trash, taking notes and pictures and all that! Someone should call the police!”

“He’s what?” I said and couldn’t help but laugh a bit.

This made Miss Meier even angrier. She gave me a hard look before she turned around and vanished behind the door to her apartment. I’d never seen her so mad before.

On my way out, I finally put two and two together. Don’t tell me this weirdo was going through people’s trash to see what he could find out about them. Did he ever find anything on me?

Were the arguments about that? Had people seen him do that? Or was he confronting them about the things he found out?

It was one of the weirdest and especially nastiest things I’d ever heard. But, it was so utterly bizarre that it was almost fascinating. Why was he doing it?

The next time I threw out the trash, I couldn’t help but talk to dumpster man about it. I handed him a cigarette and told him I knew what he was up to. He burst out laughing.

“Yo man, let’s cut a deal. You don’t report me, and I won’t check out your trash anymore, kay?”

“Sure, but I doubt you’d find anything interesting in my trash anyways.”

For a moment he gave me a knowing grin that unnerved me quite a bit. Shortly after he started laughing again.

“I’m joking bro.”

I couldn’t help but laugh as well. To be honest, I hadn’t even thought about reporting him. I found his antics quite exciting and wanted to see how this whole thing played out. Right at that moment, I remembered the muscle dude that was about to beat him up.

“Say, what was the problem with that muscular dude that almost beat you up?” I asked.

“That dude? Wasn’t quite happy that I found his issue of ‘bear magazine’. Simply asked if his chick knew about it. Was all it took to shut him up.”

Man, this guy was such an asshole, yet I couldn’t help but chuckle a bit.

“So, what’s this whole thing about? What are you getting out of it? Money?”

“Nah man, I haven’t found anything that serious yet. It’s mostly awkward shit that’s a bit embarrassing. To be honest with ye, back at university I was a psych major. Thought it might be interesting to see how people react when you find out their secrets. Well, and it’s funny as hell of course.”

There wasn’t anything else I could say.

“Well, if you find anything that’s really interesting, let me know,” I said when I left.

From then on I ended up chatting with dumpster man quite a few times. What can I say, the guy was interesting enough, at least compared to everyone else I’d gotten to know in the building. And I guess there was this weird fascination with the stuff he uncovered.

What I didn’t think about was other people’s reaction. Word about dumpster man and his shenanigans had gotten around. When they saw me hanging out with him, it was only natural that they assumed I was involved in it as well.

Miss Meier, who’d been nothing but friendly to me, wouldn’t even look at me now.

“Can’t believe you’re hanging out with that guy,” she once scoffed at me in the hallway.

She wasn’t the only one though. It was quite a few other people who gave me the stink-eye and talked about me behind my back. Oh well, whatever, not like I cared.

In time dumpster man got into his own set of troubles. There was this elderly couple that ended up screaming at him for almost half an hour. Then there was the time he got beat up by a group of younger dudes. And of course, he got in trouble with the police. They were there more than ones, lecturing him.

When I talked to him though, he was always in high spirits. He struck me almost as the buildings jester or something. When I asked him about the cops, he told me it was nothing serious. As long as he wasn’t in trouble of being locked up, he’d ride this whole thing out as long as he could.

All that high spirit and energy was gone when I saw him again earlier this week. He was sitting against the wall of the dumpster area, holding a cigarette in his shaking hands. He didn’t even look up when I greeted him.

The moment I returned I went over to him. He was furiously going through his small notebook and the pictures on his phone.

“Hey, what’s up?”

The moment he noticed that I stood in front of him, he jerked back and almost hit his head against the wall.

“Fuck man, you scared me!”

“What’s the matter with you? Found something interesting?”

He opened his mouth as if to say something, but he shook his head. He put away his notebook and his phone and made his way back inside.

“Oh come on, I know-” I started.

“It’s nothing, man. Just got tired of the whole trash thing, kay?”

Whit that he hurried up the stairs. I was about to follow him, but realized that I didn’t even know his real name, nor his apartment. Oh well, I thought, he’s going to be back out there soon.

Oh, he was back out there. This time it wasn’t outside the dumpster area though.

It was yesterday evening that the garbage man called the cops. When they’d emptied the dumpsters, they’d found a corpse inside, dumpster man’s.

When the police checked the rest of the dumpsters, they found various other things. There were human teeth, not one or two, but dozens of them. What was even worse though, was a small bag containing nothing but patches of human skin.

I am typing this out now because this has all turned way too weird way too quickly.

I am pretty sure that dumpster man must have found something that day. That’s why he was such a mess, and that’s why he was killed. I am also pretty damn sure that he knew who threw them away.

When I went out today, I still got those disdainful stares.

I can’t help but think that one of them killed dumpster man. What I am worried about now though, is that they think I know their identity as well.

Sounds

Sounds can drive you insane. It can be a dripping tap, the neighbor’s loud music or the constant chatter of co-workers. I was never bothered much by these things. I guess it was easy for me to down them out. Maybe it’s because I grew up in an urban area.

In my new apartment, things were different.

When I had to move because of a new job, I was forced to take the first apartment I could find. It was located in an old, two-story building. It had been written out as a recently renovated, modern place, but this couldn’t have been further from the truth. The place was a relic from the seventies. It was filled with the perpetual odor of old wood, and the musty air inside was almost suffocating. Here and there the wallpaper was faded, the floorboards creaked with every step, and I could’ve sworn I heard the faint drop of an old, leaking pipe somewhere deep within the walls.

The place’s landlord, Mr. Reinhardt, can best be described in three words: uptight, stingy, and condescending. As he led me through the place he went on about all sorts of rules: no loud noise after eight, not more than one visitor at a time, I could paint the living room, but not the kitchen, and god knows what else. It was an endless list, which he recited in an entirely bored and monotonous voice. The only positive thing was that he didn’t mind me bringing my cat, Paws, along.

The moment I’d signed the contract, he told me he’d not be around much, if at all. He preferred a ‘pay rent and leave me alone’ type of relationship. To say I didn’t like him was quite the understatement. He also didn’t seem to care about his tenants at all. He didn’t even bother telling me how many other people lived there, and I’m not sure he even knew.

When I moved in, I only saw two other tenants. One was a young man, smoking a cigarette near the building’s entrance, greeting me with an overly-friendly, overdrawn smile. I gave him a nod, but hurried on, rather unsettled by his smile. The other was Miss Schulz, a friendly older lady living next door. We chit-chatted for a bit. She was such a sweet lady, and I felt bad when I excused myself to finishing moving in.

The sounds started the first night. They came out of nowhere. I was taking care of a few boxes, when sudden sounds made me look up. It was a barely audible humming that reminded me of screeching or wailing, entirely different from the usual sounds of a bustling city. It was an unsettling, almost alien noise that wormed itself deep into my brain.

I first thought something was playing on my phone or laptop, but that wasn’t it. Then I checked the wall to Miss Schulz’s apartment, but everything was quiet. My eyes wandered around the apartment; it was already dark outside, and as the strange hum persisted, I felt goosebumps all over my arms. For the next couple of minutes, I went from room to room, trying to locate the sounds, but then told myself to calm down.

“There’s no such things as ghosts,” I told myself. “Right, Paws?”

The little guy answered me with a happy meow and rubbed against my ankle. Eventually, I just shrugged it off as something in the house. The place was old, the floorboards were creaking, pipes were leaking, so it was probably one of the water boilers.

When I heard the sounds more often though, I got unnerved. I wasn’t the only one, though. Poor Paws was agitated as well. He was scurrying through the apartment in an endless search for their origin. At times, I’d even find him sitting in a corner, simply staring at the walls or the ceiling. It wasn’t long before I began doing the same. I checked the whole place, every nook and cranny, but found nothing.

When I talked to Miss Schulz, she wasn’t much help. She’d heard nothing like it, but said her ears weren’t good anymore. Even with her hearing aids, she could barely make out what was on TV.

After my talk with her, I decided to check up the apartment upstairs. I called myself stupid for not doing so right ahead. God knows, it might be the people upstairs. When I arrived at the door, however, the name plate was gone. I rang the doorbell and knocked a few times, but no one answered. I sighed. Guess I can strike out that possibility. Great.

On my way back to the stairs, I ran into the same young man I’d seen outside when I first moved in.

“There’s no one living there,” he said in a friendly voice. “Are you looking for someone?”

“Oh, it’s nothing,” I answered, “but thanks.”

He nodded.

“I’m Mr. Stein,” he said, his smile all teeth.

Once more, I noticed how overdrawn it was.

“I’m Jenny. Nice to meet you,” I mumbled, slightly taken aback by his demeanor.

He reached out a hand, and when I took it, I couldn’t help but squirm a little. This felt less like a handshake, but more like him caressing my hand, testing it. All the while, his disgustingly sweet smile never wavered.

“Well, good to know you,” I said, freeing my hand, and returning downstairs.

Back in my apartment, I had no clue what to do. If those sounds weren’t coming from above, I was at my wit’s end. The more I suffered through the hum, the more anxious I felt. Sitting alone in the dim light of my laptop, the hum began gnawing at my nerves. At times, I almost jumped up, thinking someone or… something was there, like an invisible presence, stalking me unseen.

“Maybe Mister Reinhardt knows what’s up,” I thought, and dialed his number.

The moment he picked up, I heard the annoyance in his voice.

“Jesus, who the hell’s calling me at this hour? It’s almost ten!”

“It’s Miss Mann. There are these sounds, this humming, and-“

“You’re calling me about what now? A sound?” he cut me off. “Last time I was there, there was no damn sound or anything!”

“It’s not there all the time, only now and then, but I’ve got no idea where it’s coming from or what’s causing it. Can’t you send someone over? Like a maintenance person?”

“Pah, humbug! There’s always sounds in buildings like that. No reason to get so worked up about it! You young people and your-“

“It’s not normal! It’s like-“

“Whatever it is, I want to hear nothing about it! Especially not at this hour of the night!”

“But it’s your building, and-“

“And I’m free to kick you out whenever I want.”

This shut me up. I couldn’t afford to move again.

“See, young lady?” he started in his most condescending voice. “This issue is already over.”

With that, he hung up.

“That bastard! I cursed before I threw myself back on the couch.

Over the next few weeks, I tried my best to ignore the hum, telling myself there had to be a logical explanation. But before long, it was getting to me. One night, while grabbing a glass of water, it scared me so badly, I almost dropped it. Going to the bathroom wasn’t any better. It felt like the hum started the moment I stepped out of my bedroom, as if some unseen apparition was waiting for me, and coming to get me. The worst were the nights when I lay in bed, awake, dreading, half-waiting for the hum’s return. Other times, I thought I heard it, only to realize I was imagining things.

Whatever sleep I got was plagued by terrible nightmares, and I’d wake up covered in cold sweat, only to be greeted by the now ever-present sound. I one dream, I wandered through a twisted version of my apartment, populated by wailing figures. In another, a giant shade crawled towards me on the ceiling, screeching like broken machinery.

At work, I was a mess, and I noticed my boss watching me with concern. I knew I had to move, but no matter how hard I looked, I couldn’t find another affordable apartment. I felt trapped.

One day, after work, Miss Schulz approached me. The moment she put her hand on my arm, I jerked back, dropping my keys.

“Jesus Christ,” I cursed, but when I saw her next to me, I sighed with relief.

“I’m so sorry,” I apologized. “I’m such a mess these days…”

“It’s all right, dear. How about some tea?”

I smiled weakly and was about to decline. But what was I going to do in my apartment, anyway? Sit around all day, on edge, waiting for the hum to start again? Five minutes later, I sat on her couch and told her I thought about moving.

“Well, dear, I can’t blame you. With a place like this, and Mr. Reinhardt as your landlord… If I were younger, I’d find myself a nicer place, too.”

“That man’s the worst,” I said, giving a little laugh.

“Oh believe me, he is! You know those renovations back in the day? He made such a fuzz about them. I thought he’d modernize the entire place, but do you know what he did? A bit of paint here, some new wallpaper there, and a few new tiles in the bathroom. That was it! Oh, and they installed that new exhaust system. I think he was required by law to replace the old ventilation shafts. He’d never done it otherwise.”

“Wait, Miss Schulz. Ventilation shafts? What did they do with them?”

The old lady looked up at me in surprise.

“Those things? They closed them off, and that was it. Knowing Mr. Reinhardt, they probably just put some plaster over the opening.”

I sat there, wide-eyed. Don’t tell me that was where those damned sounds came from.

“What is it dear?” she asked, when she saw me like that.

“Oh, I just remembered something. I got to go!”

She nodded and helped me to the door, but was quite surprised at my sudden reaction.

Back in my apartment, I had no idea where to look. I didn’t know the first thing about ventilation shafts. I walked from room to room, listening intently, but the hum was so low, I couldn’t pinpoint it. After half an hour, I slumped down on the couch in frustration. By then, it was gone again.

“Hey Paws, come here, little guy!”

He didn’t react. Instead, he was sitting in the bathroom, staring at a corner. Then it hit me. Cats have much better ears than humans. Had the little guy figured it out already? A few moments later, I got myself a chair and began checking the bathroom walls. Miss Schulz had said they’d covered the openings with plaster, so I should be able to find them by knocking, right? I didn’t know if it was even working, told myself this was ridiculous, stupid even. I knocked against the wall here and there, furiously, and suddenly the sound changed. It sounded almost as if the wall was reverberating from inside. That’s it! I’d found it! In an instant, I picked up a hammer I’d used to put together my furniture, and went to work. I smashed it against the bathroom tiles with all the strength I could muster, again and again. My arm ached and trembled from the effort, my breath came in short, hard burst, and sweat was dripping down my face. But I didn’t stop, I couldn’t. Finally, a small hole was revealed.

I rushed forward, tearing at the remaining plaster. When I was done, the air was heavy with dust. I stood in front of a small rectangular opening, a shaft stretching upward inside the wall. Yet, wasn’t the apartment above empty? What the hell was going on? As if to answer me, the sounds started again, but this time much louder. Paws began meowing right away. As I stood there on the chair, an icy shiver went down my spine. For the first time, I realized what I’d been hearing these past weeks: the cries of a person.

I called the cops right away. The moment they heard the sounds, they called for backup and broke down the door to the apartment above. What they found was pure chaos. The entire place was trashed. Where the kitchen should’ve been, they found a holding cell. Inside was an older man, chained to the wall and barely alive.

As I answered the police’s questions, I was a mess. I had so many thoughts on my mind, so many questions. When I mentioned Mr. Stein, the overly-friendly young man I’d met, they looked up. They told me the name wasn’t on Mr. Reinhardt’s list of tenants. After I’d given a detailed description of the man, a few of the other tenants recalled seeing him as well. They, too, had assumed he was another tenant, but in reality, he must’ve been a stranger.

What makes this whole thing even weirder is that the apartment above was indeed rented. After a check-up, it was revealed that it was under a fake name. Mr. Reinhardt said it had been a middle-aged man who’d signed the contract, but after he was given Mr. Stein’s description, he state it was a different man. Whoever that man was, however, he always paid rent, and always on time, so there was never a need for questions, Mr. Reinhardt said.

By now, the police have started a manhunt for Mr. Stein, but the trail has gone cold, and the man has simply vanished. Even now, lying in bed at night, I can’t stop thinking about that damned smile, that overdrawn, toothy grin, and the way he held onto my hand.

He’s still out there. Every time I walk past my building, I can’t help but glance over my shoulder, half-expecting to see him lurking nearby, staring at me with that same unnerving grin.

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